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Five Stories: Unlikely First Meetings
Our readers on bad pickup lines, drunkenness, laundromats — and the surprising relationships they led to.
Looking for a good time?
It was Wednesday, and Dollar Drink night was well underway. With a bladder full of cheap beer and legs I couldn't keep crossed anymore, I bee-lined for the bathroom. There I came across the classic "Call This Number for a Good Time" scribble. This poor guy, I thought. I would die if my number was on a bathroom stall. In a fit of good will, I decided to tell him. Luckily, in our day and age, it's unnecessary to actually call; all I had to do was send a text.
Me: "Dude, did you know your number is on a bathroom stall?"
Bathroom Stall Stranger: "Where at?"
M: "Girls' bathroom, upstairs middle stall, at Chuck's. I consider this my community service for the year. If I had a pen I would black it out."
BSS: "Really? I'm across the street from Chuck's right now. Meet me out front."
M: "I'm just curious -- are you a boy or a girl?"
BSS: "Do you think a lesbian put a girl's number up there?"
M: "Could happen."
BSS: "I'm def a dude, LOL."
M: "Okay cool. I'm deleting all this now because I can't be the girl who has a friend she met on a bathroom stall. Bye!"
BSS: "Ouch! This would be a sweet story to tell years from now when we're best friends."
M: "No, it wouldn't. It would make me look like a total creeper and not the good Samaritan I truly am."
BSS: "Whatever. You're not the creeper; it's my number that's on a bathroom stall!"
M: "Uh, it's super creepy to text the number that says 'for a good time.' It's like a step away from prostitution."
BSS: "Just come downstairs. I'll buy you beer and we can find a sharpie. I have a black hat on."
Luckily, when I got downstairs, he was adorable and about as hungry as I was. After sneaking him into the girl's room to scratch out his number and replace it with "Ryan and Mila Were Here," we made a scandalous-looking exit out of the bathroom, out of the bar, and on to Taco Bell. We've been together ever since. — Jamila Brown
Submit to our next "Five Stories" contest! Disturbingly Bad First Dates — ever go out with a guy, only to realize, midway through, that he didn't know your fiirst name? Did a girl ever take you to meet her parents? If so, we want to hear about it! Click here for more details, or send your story to firstname.lastname@example.org.