Drive Time Meditation: Would You Date Him?
5/31/2006 5:00:00 PM
Russell Brand has dated Kate Moss, among others. He's a stand-up comic who describes himself as "totally obsessed with sex." He was fired by MTV after "turning up to work dressed as Osama Bin Laden - the day after the 9/11 attacks." He has a six-point seduction routine. Number five: "Be Post-modern: In this post- modern era everyone knows what's going on, so say things like, "I'd like to chat you up. I'm chatting you up now. Are you enjoying this chatting-up?" Reference the process." Think long and hard about whether or not these things would work on you, and if they would, we hope you stay up all night taking a personal inventory.
Permalink : http://www.nerve.com/nerveblog/scannerblog.aspx?id=96e4917#4917 |
This Just In: More Celebrity Fecundity
5/31/2006 3:00:00 PM
Gwen Stefani's new baby, born Friday, is named Kingston James McGregor Rossdale. Wonder if that's why Kingston, New York is celebrating the month of May?
Permalink : http://www.nerve.com/nerveblog/scannerblog.aspx?id=96e4920#4920 |
Jose Gonzalez CD Giveaway!
5/31/2006 2:59:05 PM
We ran an interview a few weeks ago with Jose Gonzalez, and now we find ourselves with three brand-new copies of his CD, Veneer. The contest is now over. Winners are: Jason, Daniel and Frances. Thanks to all who played!
Permalink : http://www.nerve.com/nerveblog/scannerblog.aspx?id=96e4921#4921 |
Lost? Consult the Literature Map
5/31/2006 2:00:00 PM
The Literature-Map is an addictive little program that recommends authors to you, based on the name of one you already like. When you type in “Arthur Bradford,” you can watch the name “David Sedaris” snuggle up to him, while Bukowski, Vonnegut, and Orwell back slowly away. Make of this what you will.
Permalink : http://www.nerve.com/nerveblog/scannerblog.aspx?id=96e4919#4919 |
Bad Behavior at High Noon: Hazing
5/31/2006 12:00:00 PM
Northwestern women's soccer players apologized after photos of their hazing rituals were posted online. The pictures feature "players in their underwear, dressed in costumes, blindfolded with their hands bound by athletic tape, consuming alcohol and performing sexually suggestive acts." Apparently, female athletes can be just as perverse as male ones.
Permalink : http://www.nerve.com/nerveblog/scannerblog.aspx?id=96e4907#4907 |
Quote of the Day: Katie Couric
5/31/2006 11:14:25 AM
We caught a bit of Katie Couric's beatification — oops, we mean farewell show — on NBC this morning. Her reaction to all the swooning and serenading? "I'm feeling happy and sad and completely out of control. And you know how much I like that."
Permalink : http://www.nerve.com/nerveblog/scannerblog.aspx?id=96e4916#4916 |
Today in Teacher-Student Sex
5/31/2006 11:04:18 AM
A forty-year-old NYC Montessori school teacher has been accused of having sex with two junior-high boys. Unfortunately for her, her elder alleged victim, now twenty-three, grew up to be an NYPD officer.
Permalink : http://www.nerve.com/nerveblog/scannerblog.aspx?id=96e4915#4915 |
Video of the Day: Don't Mean a Thing-ga
5/31/2006 11:00:17 AM
This captivating version of Janet Jackson's "Nasty Boys" is the masterwork of one Sondra Prill, "queen of the Tampa Public Access airwaves."
Permalink : http://www.nerve.com/nerveblog/scannerblog.aspx?id=96e4914#4914 |
In The News: Marie Osmond's Mission
5/31/2006 10:45:25 AM
Pop star-turned-doll maker Marie Osmond has launched a personal crusade to clean up the Internet.Three third graders were suspended for talking about oral sex. Way not to overreact. Elizabeth Taylor says she once frolicked in bed with Michael Jackson and his nephews and that's how she knows he's not a pervert. Cartoon superhero Batwoman will be reincarnted as "wealthy, buxom lipstick lesbian." She will be "a lesbian socialite by night and a crime fighter by later in the night." Dutch pedophiles are launching a new political party called "Charity, Freedom and Diversity." Their many opponents need to get a little less obvious with the arguments than this: "They make out as if they want more rights for children. But their position that children should be allowed sexual contact from age 12 is of course just in their own interest."
Permalink : http://www.nerve.com/nerveblog/scannerblog.aspx?id=96e4913#4913 |
Quiz of the Week: Love at First Sight
5/31/2006 9:00:00 AM
Find out What kind of lover are you? Wow, are we not "thou-focused."
Permalink : http://www.nerve.com/nerveblog/scannerblog.aspx?id=96e4902#4902 |
Drive Time Meditation: Good vs. Bad Porn
5/30/2006 5:00:00 PM
The Feminist Porn Awards are being held tomorrow, June 1st, in Toronto. (Tickets here.) The awards are called Emmas in honor of Emma Goldman (1869 –1940). We didn't know Goldman had a "rebellious sex positive spirit," but apparently she did. Awads include "Best Muff Diving," "Bootylicious!," "Vixen Next Door" and "Most jaw-dropping female orgasm." We always really, really want to like feminist porn, but sometimes the porn we like has absolutely no redeeming social value whatsoever. How does everyone else deal with this?
Permalink : http://www.nerve.com/nerveblog/scannerblog.aspx?id=96e4896#4896 |
This Just In: Scientists Shouldn't Marry
5/30/2006 4:00:00 PM
According to a study, "Scientists tend to 'desist' from scientific research upon marriage, just like criminals desist from crime upon marriage."
Permalink : http://www.nerve.com/nerveblog/scannerblog.aspx?id=96e4899#4899 |
The New Party Game: Nine Percent
5/30/2006 2:00:00 PM
Scientists say you should only talk to 9% of the people at a party if you're trying to pick up a soulmate: "The researchers found that the optimum proportion of possible mates to “examine” before setting your aspirations and making your choice is a mere 9% — so at a party with 100 possible mates, it’s best to study only the first nine you randomly encounter before you choose. Examining fewer means you won’t have enough information to make a good choice, examining more makes it likely you’ll pass the best mate by. No doubt the models underestimate the complexity of real mate choice, but the fundamental insight is clear: don’t search indefinitely before choosing, lest you miss out on all the good mates or run out of time altogether." May we add from personal experience that to really increase your odds you should have at least three glasses of wine in the party's first ten minutes.
Permalink : http://www.nerve.com/nerveblog/scannerblog.aspx?id=96e4901#4901 |
Burger King's "Be a Man" Campaign
5/30/2006 12:04:56 PM
The vegan community is up in arms over Burger King's new "Be a Man" commercial, which suggests any health concerns about fast food are limp wristed. “I’ve eaten quiche, but I won’t anymore,” the men’s chorus sings. The men riot and toss a mini-van off a bridge, which lands in the back of a dump truck being towed by an old man clad in leather, who’s being led forward by a woman bearing a burger on a silver tray, just out of his reach. “I am man! I eat meat!” We like how its simultaneously homoerotic (abandoning a woman because of a lust for meat), cynical about the women's movement (bra burning is parodied) and awkward (that "incorrigible" line in particular). The ad campaign trifecta!
Permalink : http://www.nerve.com/nerveblog/scannerblog.aspx?id=96e4900#4900 |
Bad Behavior at High Noon: Wicked Adventure
5/30/2006 12:00:00 PM
The Smoking Gun has the details of an FBI plan to trap chlid-sex tourists. "Dubbed Wicked Adventures Travel, the bureau's
online operation offered various package deals, special
discounts, and even helpfully asked about a tourist's
"age preference" when it came to a young companion
("12 & under" was the first choice listed)."
Permalink : http://www.nerve.com/nerveblog/scannerblog.aspx?id=96e4801#4801 |
Double Entendre of the Day
5/30/2006 11:59:23 AM
Is Delta talking about waxing?
Permalink : http://www.nerve.com/nerveblog/scannerblog.aspx?id=96e4898#4898 |
In The News: Brad and Angelina's Civil War Baby
5/30/2006 10:43:12 AM
Brad and Angelina had their baby girl, whom they named Shiloh Nouvel Jolie-Pitt. The 1862 battle of Shiloh is described this way: "Grant did not choose to fortify his position; rather, he set about drilling his men, many of whom were raw recruits." Welcome to the world, baby!The infamous statistic about how women over forty are more likely to be killed by terrorists than to marry isn't true after all, says the originator of the statistic, a not-nearly-embarrassed-enough Newsweek. Senior citizens in Florida are getting STDs at a rapid rate (local police say when it comes to making out in parks, they're worse than teenagers). "In order to try and educate more residents of The Villages, the Leesburg Regional Medical Center plans to launch a public education program on safe sex and STD risks." Oh, so people over sixty don't get the abstinence-only spiel? All Hollywood biographies should be as lively as Ava Gardner's: "Asked by a reporter what she saw in Sinatra - a 119lb has-been - she replied demurely that 19lb of it was cock."
Permalink : http://www.nerve.com/nerveblog/scannerblog.aspx?id=96e4895#4895 |
From Our Inbox: The Back Passage
5/30/2006 9:00:00 AM
"Agatha Christie, move over! Hardcore gay sex and scandal meet in this
brilliantly funny whodunit from a major new talent: THE BACK PASSAGE by James Lear.""Mitch is a handsome,
insatiable 22-year-old hunk who never lets a clue stand in the way of a
steamy encounter, whether it's with the local constabulary, the house
secretary, or his schoolchum and fellow athlete Boy Morgan, who becomes
his Watson when they're not busy boffing each other. When Reg Walworth
is found dead in a cabinet, Sir James Eagle has his servant Meeks
immediately arrested as the killer. But Mitch's observant eye pegs more
plausible possibilities: polysexual chauffeur Hibbert, queenly pervert
Leonard Eagle, missing scion Rex, sadistic copper Kennington, even Sir
James Eagle himself. Blackmail, police corruption, a dizzying network
of spyholes and secret passages, watersports, and a nonstop queer orgy
backstairs and everywhere else mark this hilariously hardcore mystery
by a major new talent."
Permalink : http://www.nerve.com/nerveblog/scannerblog.aspx?id=96e4861#4861 |
Drive Time Meditation: Brokeback
5/29/2006 5:00:00 PM
The thing about this military institute parody of Brokeback Mountain is that barracks are so homoerotic the whole "satire" element is missing.
Permalink : http://www.nerve.com/nerveblog/scannerblog.aspx?id=96e4830#4830 |
Video of the Day: 3,000 Years in the Making
5/29/2006 3:00:00 PM
The 10 Things I Hate About Commandments mashup trailer.
Permalink : http://www.nerve.com/nerveblog/scannerblog.aspx?id=96e4857#4857 |
Bad Behavior at High Noon: Tericka Dye
5/29/2006 12:00:00 PM
Thanks to the Scanner reader who wrote this rather oddly puritanical story on the Kentucky schoolteacher and volleyball coach fired for having made porn films. The school board apparently discovered one of Tericka Dye's films (she was Rikki Andersin then) and questioned her about it. She said was homeless and bipolar and only made one film, for money. In fact, she had a great porn career. The synopsis of one film: "When she can't get enough action in the barracks, Rikki dreams of very rough sex with a pair of Russian soldiers, a toy interrogation by a fiendish Asian slut, and finally, a secret chamber full of technical screwing machines designed to break even the most insatiable major slut!" We feel that all volleyball coaches should, and probably do have, such an alter ego, and that she is to be celebrated rather than condemned.
Permalink : http://www.nerve.com/nerveblog/scannerblog.aspx?id=96e4827#4827 |
Everyone Now Has a Blog
5/29/2006 10:10:00 AM
Yes, even the LAPD. What do you think our odds are for link reciprocity?
Permalink : http://www.nerve.com/nerveblog/scannerblog.aspx?id=96e4866#4866 |
In The News: Know When Not To Talk
5/29/2006 10:00:00 AM
Joan Baez does something selfless and altruistc, then fucks it up by
sounding like a racist: "I associated very strongly with the brown-skinned
people here."
Permalink : http://www.nerve.com/nerveblog/scannerblog.aspx?id=96e4862#4862 |
Crush of the Week: Al Gore
5/29/2006 9:00:00 AM
Between his global-warming documentary An Inconvenient Truth and this pretty great State of the Union spoof on SNL, Al Gore is making a pretty decent bid for our affections. New York magazine put him on the cover. It looks like there's actually a chance he'll pull a Nixon and make a big comeback without, you know, being Nixon. And for that, he is our crush of the week. — Ada Calhoun
Permalink : http://www.nerve.com/nerveblog/scannerblog.aspx?id=96e4859#4859 |
