Spider-Man producers hit Julie Taymor with countersuit

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Like characters in some tragic play, no one involved in the production of Broadway's ill-fated Spider-Man: Turn Off the Dark will escape without harm. After months of budget issues, delays, injured actors, delays, creative battles, and delays, director and co-writer Julie Taymor was finally ousted by producers in order to create a less ambitious, less dangerous, less insane, but ultimately more boring musical. But she didn't take such a move sitting down — she had, after all, put more than a little time and energy into this turkey — so she sued the producers for violating her creative rights and not compensating her appropriately for all the work she had done before she left. (Basically, she wanted full royalties.)

Well, two can play at that game, Ms. Taymor. Now the producers of the show have come back with their own countersuit, which alleges that Taymor was more of a hindrance than a help when it came to the big-budget spectacle:

"The producers charge that while Taymor was contracted to co-write and collaborate on the musical that has music from U2′s Bono and The Edge, she refuses “to fulfill her contractual obligations, declaring that she could not and would not do the jobs that she was contracted to do.” The producers claim her stubbornness left them no choice but to replace her with Philip Wm. McKinley, whose vast background with Barnum & Bailey Circus helped curb the aerial mishaps, and a rewrite by Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa and Glen Berger cured enough of the production’s ills to save the show."

No one leaves unscathed. (Especially the actors!) Really, though, I think this whole ordeal is a sign that what Taymor needs to do is get back to her more successful roots, like Titus. And by that I mean she should kill the producers' children, bake them into a pie, and feed them to said unwitting producers in a unnatural display of extreme depravity that brings them all to the bloody end of an unstoppable cycle of revenge. Sound good?