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Four Loko to be turned into ethanol, recycled water

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Four Loko

What an unexpectedly great news week for all you drunks out there! Not only can you now get whiskey in a can, but Four Loko is apparently good for the environment. Okay, so that doesn't mean you can legally drink it or anything, but it does mean that ever-industrious scientists are buying scorned cases of Four Loko in bulk and recycling it into ethanol, all so that the banned beverage can serve as fuel for your car instead of fuel for your next night in prison, night in the bed of a total stranger, or night in the bed of a total stranger in prison.

One ethanol plant in Virginia is busy distilling the massive amounts of alcohol in the drinks into gasoline and separating whatever water appears in them for recycling, likely turning it all into fuel within the next few months. Depending on your priorities, this is either a pretty cool step forward for science and sustainability, or yet another sad death knell for the most misunderstood beverage of modern times.