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Japanese butt-scanning system identifies people by their butts
By EJ DicksonDecember 30th, 2011, 12:30 amComments (6)
Brothers and sisters of the future! No longer will you have to rely on faulty car alarms, pricy LoJack systems, or your three year-old nephew acting as a 24-hour watchdog to protect your motor vehicle. Thanks to the folks at Japan's Advanced Institute of Industrial Technology, the most reliable car security system of the next century will be your butt. According to the Daily, researchers at the institute have developed a scanning system that identifies the owner of a car by the shape of his or her butt. Screw extreme climate change and the polar ice caps melting: with the advent of ass-scanning technology, doesn't the future look just a little bit brighter now?
The "Can Scan" (clevs!) works by embedding 360 precise sensors into the driver's seat, which verify the driver's identity before the car starts. The system is 98 percent accurate, and the inventors hope to make the technology widely available two to three years from now. So there you have it: if we're lucky, the release of the butt-scanning security system will coincide with the release of both Avatar 2 and the second How To Train Your Dragon movie. Who says we can't have it all?
Commentarium (6 Comments)
Geez.
How would it work in a car shared by 2 or more people? Or when a mechanic is test-driving it after a repair?
@dry Vurr......Who cares, didn't you read?? this shit scans your butt!!
@What - the scanner verifies the driver's identity, and won't allow the car to be started by someone whose identity it doesn't recognize. Perhaps multiple identies (members of a family, or couriers who share a company vehicle) could be stored. But how would it recognize a temporary driver such as a mechanic? A mechanic could be scanned, and added to the accepted list. But so could a thief. And how would this work with rental cars?
You don't have to put it into every car. It'd probably be for higher end cars like BMW 7 series.
You step in, sit in, it auto adjusts the pedals, steering wheel, lumbar support, seating distance, climate control, radio station, and unlocks the starting ability for your car. Maybe have an override control when the owner (or authorized personnel) activate it when they drop it off at the mechanics.
Lol, how can you link butt scanning to the release of a couple of 2011 films. I guess you sit to watch them right?