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Mark Wahlberg could have saved us from one of the 9/11 terrorist attacks (according to him)

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In the February issue of Men's Journal, Marky Mark opens up… like never before. But before, he probably had the right idea not to open up. At least not this much.

Apparently, the star of many an action-hero movie was scheduled to be on one of the planes that crashed into the World Trade Center, but decided to hop another plane to Toronto a week earlier. But if only he had been on the plane! Oh, if only. History could have been rewritten! Wahlberg, on the missed connection:

“If I was on that plane with my kids, it wouldn’t have went down like it did. There would have been a lot of blood in that first-class cabin and then me saying, ‘Okay, we’re going to land somewhere safely, don’t worry.’”

This isn't the first time he's mentioned how his naturally-heroic self could have saved the day — he said in a 2006 interview that he'd "had probably over fifty dreams about it." But man, that's quite a cinematic image he's conjured up: the cabin drenched in blood and him standing (possibly shirtless, possibly draped in the Gadsden Flag) at the front of the cabin, reassuring the passengers in his best whisper-growl. Maybe he should turn it into a movie in the vein of Inglorious Basterds — about the bad guy not prevailing. Perhaps that would allay those recurring "what-if" dreams — those must get to a guy after a while. And surely Mark Wahlberg would be just the man to handle a film like that artfully and sensitively.

Actually, it would probably immediately enter into our canon of the Worst Pop Culture Responses to 9/11. But that wouldn't stop me from going to see it.