British life coach Ali Campbell knows that men are often confused when it comes to discerning a potential mate's level of interest. So in his new book, More Than Just Sex, he endeavors to explain how a woman's eye movements may reveal what she's feeling.
According to Campbell, the forty-five seconds after a man first initiates eye contact with a woman are very revealing, in terms of gauging her interest, if he understands the meaning of her glances. For instance, if a woman looks down and moves her eyes in a sweeping motion across the floor, it means she's totally into you. As Campbell puts it, "It's the Holy Grail of looks. If a guy can pick up on that he has a sure-fire way to work out if she is interested."
If a woman looks away and then stares you straight in the eye, it's another tell-tale sign that she's digging you because she's assessing whether you'd make a suitable partner.
"Most guys have the idea that if they make eye contact and she looks away she is not interested. But she will look away, that's inevitable. That's what happens when we think to ourselves and also consider our feelings."
For dudes who wish to avoid wasting time (and money on a drinks bill) with a woman who's not interested in them, but whose egos preclude them from perceiving this, Campbell has some helpful information. If, after first making eye contact, a woman immediately looks over a man's head, or stares straight back at him, it means she's not feeling him, and it's time to move on.
Back on the positive side of the ledger, if a woman uses her dominant wrist to point at you, it means she likes you, and touching her hair is a sign of attraction, with hair-twirling a sign that you're really golden. Most of this sounds obvious, but then, if it was, there would be no need for a book like this.
"I have interviewed literally hundreds of women and too many men concentrate on having the right car, the right watch, the right whatever. But it is rubbish, all the women I spoke to told me they are just interested in what men are like inside."
Of course, all of this stuff is hard to quantify, and "rules" like Campbell's are often more about easing people's anxiety; attraction can be a pretty idiosyncratic thing. But who knows? Probably more important than memorizing these signs is just going out and making some eye contact for yourself.