News

Jay-Z, Beyoncé invited to play royal wedding reception

Pin it

Jay-Z and Beyonce.

Jay-Z and Beyoncé, who are recorded in the Guinness World Records as being the two coolest people to have ever had sex with each other, have reportedly been invited to perform at the wedding reception of Prince William and Kate Middleton, the two nerdiest people in the world according to anyone who realizes that the Royals are adults who spend their lives playing pretend. (This should be everyone, by the way.)

It's still too early to know if the couple has formally extended their offer, or if Jay and Beyoncé would even accept, but it's never too early to make blind, unwarranted guesses about which songs they'd play. Might Beyoncé play for Kate one of her girl-power anthems like "Single Ladies" or, well, "Girls (Who Run the World)," which would actually be maybe too awkwardly relevant? Or would she just cover some boring old diva who isn't known for turning wrist movements into high art? And as for Jay, wouldn't it be kind of surreal to see him to rap about being rich in front of Old World monarchs? 

Also, do William and Kate even know about this yet?:

Because if not, this changes everything!