Newt Gingrich

Newt Gingrich — who is one of the few serious contenders for the 2012 Republican Presidential nod, unless you agree with Bill O'Reilly that he's not that serious — has been held back in the past by what some call his, uh, monogamy problems. Which is a nice way of putting it, kind of like calling that gross Rick Santorum joke a "Google problem." A mean way of putting it would be to say Newt has a "cheating on women with fatal diseases problem."  

The former Speaker of the House has been divorced twice and publicly admitted to cheating. He left his first wife when she was diagnosed with cancer (visiting her in the hospital to discuss their split), and then left the woman he left her for when the second woman was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis — after cheating on her. If I were his current mistress, I would go to the oncologist, like, every day. 

In an interview today with the Christian Broadcast Network, Newt tried to come clean: 

"There's no question at times of my life, partially driven by how passionately I felt about this country, that I worked far too hard and things happened in my life that were not appropriate... I found that I felt compelled to seek God's forgiveness. Not God's understanding, but God's forgiveness."

He also, of course, subtly suggests that he cheated because he loved America. Gingrich, for the record, remains firmly opposed to gay marriage (it would weaken the sacrament) and has dodged direct questions about the contradictions that might pose, when considered aside his personal life. He has not yet announced his intention to run, but has formed an official exploratory campaign. 

Commentarium (7 Comments)

Mar 09 11 - 5:00pm
stargirl

I would not want some one who seems to leave when things get tough to be in charge of running our country.

Mar 09 11 - 5:44pm
anon

4 realz.

Mar 09 11 - 5:50pm
RexMerritt

Don't we usually prefer to be led by people better than ourselves? And if this knucklehead could abandon his cancer-ridden wife, imagine what he'd do to the country if he were in charge.

Mar 09 11 - 7:01pm
PeterSmith

This man's capacity for dissembling is incredible. Just parse that defense: "There's no question at times of my life, partially driven by how passionately I felt about this country [which is somehow directly related], that I worked far too hard [unlike the apathetic blue-collar types who stay faithful to their wives out of SHEER INDOLENCE] and things happened [they just happened!] in my life that were not appropriate... I found that I felt compelled to seek God's forgiveness [which is convenient for me given God's highly debatable, um, existence.]"

Mar 09 11 - 10:15pm
S

There is something particularly stupid about talking about God's "understanding". St. Augustine is rolling in his grave.

Mar 10 11 - 12:46pm
Publius

You need to re-read the quote. Saint Augustine would understand the reference. The rest of the quote? A bit too self-serving for my taste.

Mar 09 11 - 11:47pm
CdeLeo

"President Gingrich, NORAD has confirmed multiple missile launches, I repeat multiple miss.............where'd he go?".