If you heard the song "Grim Grinnin' Ghosts" at some point during your Halloween debauchery, you know from the lyrics that they occasionally come out to socialize. What the song doesn't tell you is that they also like to bone one another — at least, according to Euclid, Ohio woman Dianne Carlisle, who purports to have seen two spirits bumping uglies in her living room. "It looks like ghosts having sex in my living room!" she says of the above photo, which her four-year old granddaughter took while playing with her cell phone. "They are having sex, you can see the lady's high heeled shoes!"

Um, awkwardly paging Dr. Peter Venkman? We're calling because there's something strange in the neighborhood, but we don't want you to bust the ghosts so much as we want you to, like, take photos of them doin' it and stuff.

Carlisle's story has attracted the interest of paranormal experts nationwide. One such expert, Alexandra Holzer, says that the case is not an uncommon one, as there are many witness accounts of two ghosts having sex. "When you're dealing with residual energy, which is what a ghost is, any intense emotional experience can be imprinted, and that could be an act of passion," she says. 

So with Holzer's expert input, let's assemble a basic profile of the ghosts in Carlisle's house. A) They like to have sex. B) They don't mind having sex in front of four-year olds. Gross. C) One of them wears high heels, so she was female (or maybe not — who are we to make gendered assumptions of the deceased based on their footwear?) D) They were from Euclid, Ohio, a suburb of Cleveland, so they loved cold weather, LeBron James, pierogis, and inefficient mass transit. And, finally, E), They're not, in fact, ghosts, but the products of weird angles and lighting, because there's no such fucking thing as ghosts, and there's certainly no such thing as fucking ghosts.

 

Tags sex

Commentarium (12 Comments)

Nov 02 11 - 7:12pm
Jen

I hope that's what I will be doing in the afterlife.

Nov 02 11 - 7:16pm
enough

You people will write anything you're paid to write won't you?

Nov 02 11 - 9:51pm
lezley

"paid" lol

Nov 02 11 - 8:42pm
titchnay

WHO YA GONNA CALL? GHOSTBUSTERS

Nov 02 11 - 8:53pm
Saratoga Slim

Why can't ghost have babies? Because they have hollow weenies!

Guess it's better spoken than written...

Nov 14 11 - 11:49pm
:)

Naw, its still funny written. Made me chuckle so your time wasn't wasted. :D

Nov 02 11 - 9:33pm
=(

Everything was good about that article, except the ending, party pooper =(

Nov 03 11 - 10:48am
mp

GHOSTLUSTERS

Nov 03 11 - 11:55am
titchnay

THIS IS FUNNY

Nov 20 11 - 8:52am
Kaylyn

A good many valualebs you've given me.

Nov 20 11 - 12:08pm
tscluau

JNDIE0 zgrblbjjbnia

Nov 24 11 - 1:41pm
aktnzfbl

6SwQre jczsgvbcrjca