Brett Ratner almost manages half-apology for using gay slur

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Brett Ratner — the man who brought you Rush Hour and will direct the 2012 Academy Awards — really stepped in it this weekend when, at a screen for his new film Tower Heist, he declared that "Rehearsal is for fags." (An attitude that goes a long way towards explaining the quality of his output! Thanks for clearing that up, Brett.) Apparently you don't just get to throw around gay slurs like an intellectually bankrupt tenth grader doing whippets behind a Hardee's anymore, so Ratner pretty quickly realized that he needed to do some form of damage control, maybe release a statement about how he was wrong to use such an offensive and ugly word at all, let alone in such a flippant manner, and he will work to strike it from his vocabulary or some such.

Instead, he said this:

I apologize for any offense my remarks caused. It was a dumb way of expressing myself. Everyone who knows me knows that I don’t have a prejudiced bone in my body. But as a storyteller I should have been much more thoughtful about the power of language and my choice of words.

1. When you apologize "for any offense my remarks caused," you are not apologizing at all. That's like saying "I apologize for any injuries my swinging fist caused." You don't apologize for how other people react, you apologize for what you did. And if you don't think what you did is wrong — which is what such a statement makes it sound like, honestly — then just don't bother saying anything at all.

2. The point is that people don't know you, Brett, and so they don't know you lack prejudiced bones. To lots of people you're just the hack who made X-Men 3: The Last Stand, who is apparently also a jerk.

3. Just don't say the fucking word! Jesus, is that so hard?

Anyway, enjoy your time at the Oscars, buddy. I hope the fags don't make you rehearse too much.