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The Farrelly Brothers’ The Three Stooges trailer drops, along with your expectations

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From left to right — Will Sasso,Chris Diamantopolos, and Sean Hayes

The vanity project. Also known as "the dream job" or "the (blank) I've always wanted to do." While vanity projects can be the culmination of an entire individual's career, for the most part they're just really self-indulgent … and from the looks of the trailer, the Farrelly Brothers' The Three Stooges falls into the latter category.

After the loss of Benecio Del Toro, Sean Penn, and Jim Carrey as the leads, no one could really expect much from replacements Will Sasso, Sean Hayes, and Chris Diamantopoulos. The movie markets itself as a continuation of the Stooges' misadventures in present day. As simple as it sounds, the reason men (and pretty much only men) love The Stooges is that they don't need to be modernized or updated. Their physical humor is timeless. Shoving an iPhone in Curly's hand just makes them seem incredibly dated. 

While I can respect the Farrelly Brothers' love for the source material, there's not much else to this remake other than recycling bits from the original shorts. Except now, instead of poking a wealthy dowager in the eye, they're poking Snooki. ('Cause that's what the kids want to see.) Worst of all, every time you look at these three guys, you're very aware that they're not the Stooges. Watching these C-listers poke and smack each around other is a lot like a fake Rolex — passable, but clearly not the genuine article.

I'm really happy Peter and Bobby Farrelly got to live out their dream of writing a Stooges movie, but there's a time and a place for everything. In this case, it would have been Hollywood in the 1940s (when the Stooges didn't need to be placed in front of a Jersey Shore cast member to be relevant) Take a look at the trailer below. By the time Larry gets pinched in the nuts by a lobster, you too will realize how awful this film will be.

On second thought, maybe it won't be so bad. At least there's no damn Shemp.