Let's do a little virtual poll: how many of you Nerve readers are planning on seeing the big-screen adaptation of the best-selling erotic novel, Fifty Shades of Grey? Nope? None of you? Let's try again: how many of you Nerve readers are planning on seeing the big-screen adaptation of the best-selling erotic novel, Fifty Shades of Grey, starring Swedish sex-on-a-stick Alexander Skarsgard as S&M-loving billionaire Christian Grey? All of you? Yes, that's pretty much what I thought. And don't think I can't see what you're doing back there, dude in the back. I understand this is very exciting news, but this is the internet, for God's sake, so please try to maintain a certain level of decorum. 

Before you get your panties in a twist, however, it must be said that Eric from True Blood hasn't officially signed up for the role yet: in fact, he just found out about it during a press conference for the upcoming film adaptation of Battleship, when a goddamn genius reporter suggested that he'd be a good fit for the role. After explaining the intricacies of the character to him (like, you know, that he's supposed to be really, really hot), Skarsgard smiled and said, "Where do I sign? He's got a sex chamber? My character [Eric Northman] has that on True Blood. He's got his little dungeon. I was born to play that part."

Skarsgard joins a long list of prospective Christian Greys, including Vampire Diaries' Ian Somerhalder, Chris Pine, and Michael Fassbender. However, anyone who has seen Eric Northman have Energizer Bunny-sex on True Blood knows that compared to Skarsgard, these dudes look about as sexually appealing as the Marx Brothers. If anyone was born to play a twenty-seven-year old billionare BDSM enthusiast, it's Eric. 

Commentarium (13 Comments)

May 02 12 - 11:59pm
Uh, Hm

Oh God, please yes!

May 03 12 - 5:53am

Oh God, this is going to be Twilight for middle-aged women, right? I can see the hype machine rolling in now.

May 03 12 - 2:16pm

I haven't read the book, but is there any way to adapt it into a BDSM three-way relationship with both Michael Fassbender AND Alexander Skarsgard?

May 04 12 - 3:08am

I wouldn't go see this piece of s___ movie....

...unless Alexander Skarsgard was in it playing the role as described above, which admittedly got me sort of aroused just imaging. Then yeah, I'd go see it.

May 04 12 - 3:38am

Skarsgard is Christian Grey no doubt about it ... and he would upgrade the story from an intellectual point of view (the books are incoherent in many aspects). Please Universal, don't make another teen movie .... cast Skarsgard and rewrite heavily the script accordingly.

May 06 12 - 10:24pm

My estrogen levels just skyrocketed into the stratosphere.

May 11 12 - 1:10pm

he is easily one of the sexiest male actors around. mmmm!

Jul 25 12 - 7:56am

Ever since I picked up the book and began reading, I've pictures Alexander skarsgard as christian grey! This would make my day!

Aug 25 12 - 3:27pm

Either Alexander Skarsgard or Michael Fassbender, pleeeeeeaaaasssseee!

Aug 28 12 - 3:29am

If he plays that role. I'm goin to read the book. Didn't have a reason to before.

Sep 06 12 - 8:02pm

He would make a great Christian Grey!!!

Sep 07 12 - 5:50pm

One could only hope!!

Sep 13 12 - 5:28pm

i want him *.* <3