George Lucas, as part of his slow-moving plan to update the Star Wars films with new technology, plans to re-release the entire series in 3D on the big screen, beginning in 2012. There are a slew of reasons why this is disappointing news:
1) The films, obviously, were not meant to be seen in 3D. What can we possibly gain for paying $20 or whatever the ticket price will be in two years, to see them?
2) He plans on releasing them in order. No, not in the order they were originally released… in chronological story order, which means The Phantom Character Development and Revenge of the Sleeping Audience will be up first.
3) He plans on releasing one film per year, meaning we'll have to wait till 2017 to see those goddamned Ewoks again… although it will be hilarious to drink heavy amounts of booze and pretend to "pet" the three-dimensional creatures as they loom in front of our special glasses.
4) Shouldn't he be busy getting us the damn movies transferred to Blu-Ray so we can see them in all their glory? Enough!