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Poor Marilyn Monroe — as if it wasn't enough that Lindsay Lohan traipses around Hollywood believing she's Monroe's heir apparent, now superstar producer Harvey Weinstein has declared that Katy Perry would be the perfect Monroe for Broadway. Yes, the singer who wears cupcake cannons on her breasts.
There must be something in Hollywood's water (my money's on greed, or perhaps cocaine) because an extraordinary number of films are being tapped for theatrical productions. While promoting My Week With Marilyn, Weinstein said that the drama could make a successful transition to the stage, and, for some reason I cannot even begin to fathom, feels that pop music's favorite lipstick lesbian would make the perfect Marilyn:
"If the movie works, I would try to make it a musical and I would go to Katy first. I think she can play Marilyn on the Broadway stage...I think she would be amazing. I mean Michelle could do it. Michelle is so good she could do it live, if she ever wanted to do it. I don't know if she would ever want to revisit it, but Katy would blow it out of the universe, and that's the kind of Broadway show I'd like to make."
If the movie works, Weinstein? Why, that sounds like a threat to me. Quick, everyone buy tickets for Happy Feet Two and Tower Heist. While watching Ben Stiller and/or a bunch of animated penguins may be painful, just imagine a blue-haired Perry prancing around stage aping Monroe's seductive whisper night after night after night after night.
I'll see you at the next showing of Puss in Boots.