“To Catch a Thief” to be remade by the man who brought you “Piranha 3D”

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Don't worry though, it's being produced by the man behind xXx and The Fast and the Furious. So, you know, there's some quality assurance. This sounds insane, but Josh Stolberg, the man behind Piranha 3D, is actually remaking the Hitchcock classic To Catch A Thief, which follows a retired cat burglar (originally played by Cary Grant) as he attempts to clear his name of a copycat. (So many cats!) He's also being assisted by a man whose only credit on IMDb is something called Man-Witch.

Here's what Stolberg had to say to Movie Hole:

It’s exciting because it’s one of my favourite Hitchcock movies and it was fun to come at it from a different angle – make it a little bit more modern and “gadgety”. It’s the first script that I’ve ever written that [encompasses] a lot of heists and action sequences and.. it was a blast! I’m really excited.

It goes without saying that Hollywood's remake vogue is getting ridiculous, and obviously "gadgety" gives me pause, but this also sounds… kind of awesome? Not in a "the awesome beauty of nature" way but more of a "dude, that's awesome" way? I mean, did you see Piranha 3D? Because there was a flying 3D penis in that thing. (I've always thought Hitchcock films were lacking in the airborne phallus department.) All in all, it sounds like an amazing possible train wreck. God, I love those.