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Lately, there seems to be a trend of power-hungry despots dying, followed by death rumors on Twitter about middle-aged rock stars spreading the same day. This is what went down when Carlos Santana was rumored to have passed away after some Internet jokester posted Gaddafi's photo with the caption, "RIP Carlos Santana," and this is what seems to have happened to poor John Francis Bongiovi. After rumors spread on Twitter about Bon Jovi's death — the day after North Korean dictator Kim Jong-Il was revealed to have suffered a heart attack — the rock star had to take to his Facebook page to prove to fans he was alive and well (and, if the photo is any indication, still sporting some pretty serious hair, proving that all is still right with the world and nothing in your life has changed significantly since 1992).
After the Daily New Blog International posted that Bon Jovi died of a heart attack at the age of 49 at something called the "Bamboozle Festival," Twitter users raised on back issues of Kerrang! and VH1 retrospectives took to their smart phones, tweeting about the singer's demise almost 1500 times. By the end of the day, Bon Jovi himself had to step in to quell rumors of his passing by posting a photo of himself on the band's Facebook page, verifying his ability to respire by holding a sign that said, "Heaven looks a lot like New Jersey: 12/19/2011, 6:00."
See, you guys, don't throw Bon Jovi on the cart with the other dead rock stars so fast, 'cause he's not dead yet! Just like Jeff Goldblum and Morgan Freeman and the Rock and every other A minus/B-plus-list celebrity who's been the subject of a Twitter death rumor. We've just got to clear up the confusion about the difference between a vicious, highly paranoid dictator who regularly performed public executions of political dissidents, and a dude from New Jersey who regularly performs the song from Young Guns II.