R. Kelly is - wait for it - hosting a five-day cruise

There are some people who just belong at sea. Like, for instance, pirates, or former Merchant Marines, or Skipper from Gilligan's Island, or Ariel in the film The Little Mermaid (that is how the movie ends, right?). Now, we can add R&B artist R. Kelly to that list of illustrious seafarers. In October 2012, Kelly will set sail for a five-day Love Letter Cruise, a private party cruise event featuring performances by Kelly himself and special guest artists, as well as a "Captain's Celebration Party," a karaoke club, and a "program featuring healthy meal choices," among other amenities (what, is there not a Q&A sesh for cruise-goers to find out how Trapped in the Closet ends? What happens to Tina and Roxanne and Twan and Sylvester and Pimp Lucious? Dammit, R.! You know just how to leave your public wanting more). 

The Carnival Cruise Line Destiny ship cruise will set sail from Miami October 1, with stops in Grand Turk, Half Moon Cay, and Nassau Bahamas. Kelly, who is currently penning an autobiography called Soula Couster: The Diary of Me, will perform in 2 shows during the cruise, which is sponsored by Concerts Cruise LLC. All guests are guaranteed seating for one show, and there are weirdly specific instructions for this policy on the cruise website. There will (presumably) be all-you-can-eat jumbo shrimp. There will (presumably) not be "water sports for under-fifteen-year olds" listed among the Deck 13 cruise activities. So, yeah... book your tickets today!

Tags r&b r. kelly

Commentarium (5 Comments)

Dec 15 11 - 4:58am
Phil

I believe I can cruise,
I believe I can drink the booze,
I think about it every night and day,
Spend some money and sail away

Dec 15 11 - 2:30pm
geebee

There's no such thing as a "Merchant Marine". There are sailors and ship's engineers and officers in a thing called "the merchant marine", a thing that encompasses all the commercial shipping of a nation. Mind you, given the amount of piracy going on these days, perhaps they ought to invent Merchant Marines to protect ships. Maybe a job for all the Blackwater guys when they come out of Iraq?

Dec 15 11 - 10:26pm
teabager=newneo con

That's been going on for a while now (former mercenaries being hired.)

Dec 15 11 - 4:49pm
mr. man

MAXIMUM SEXING

Jan 27 12 - 8:19pm
Luciana chynna Smith

I used to think that I was never going to get so close to R.Kelly BUT now im DREAMING of our true LOVE Were going too be sailing were going to be cruising I Love R.Kelly <3