Quick: if you're a lady between the ages of, say, twenty-one and thirty-one, what's the one thing that you secretly yearn for, more than anything else in the world? If your answer was, "Why, a Spice Girls reunion, of course — I'm still kicking myself for missing their 2007 North American tour," I'll just stand aside and arch an eyebrow, smirking as you babble excitedly and pee in your Union Jack underpants.
To clarify: Rolling Stone reports that the Fab Five will most likely reunite for the Queen's Diamond Jubilee, a four-day celebration from June 2-5 that will commemorate the sixtieth year of the Queen's reign. Rumors of a Spice Girls reunion during the 2012 London Olympics have been floating around for months, but Mel B. (that's Scary Spice, to you) hinted at the possibility of a reunion during the Queen's Diamond Jubilee on Australian morning TV earlier today. While appearing on the news program Sunrise to promote the Jenny Craig weight-loss program, Mel B. was asked if the girls would reunite for the Olympics; she responded by saying, "Well, we do have the Queen's Jubilee coming up," immediately following up with, "Oh, did I really say that?"
According to production staff from the show, off-camera Mel B. was contrite about letting news of the reunion slip, telling crew members, "I'm going to be in such strife for saying that. It's all so totally bloody top-secret still." But why would you ever want to keep something so beautiful a secret, Mel B.? That's like putting the sunset in a box, or moving the Mona Lisa from the Louvre to a cavern in Beech Bottom, West Virginia. Because of the Spice Girls, I will forever remember the eighteen-month period between January 1997 and June 1998 as the years when Absolutely Nothing Bad Happened, and the prospect of traveling back to that era for four days in June literally makes me so excited I could watch Spice World in its entirety without being drunk or Woody Harrelson-level stoned.
Well, maybe not that excited. But I still could totally watch this: