Former Illinois Gov. Blagojevich going to jail for fourteen years

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Former Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich — deep breath: the douchebag with the oddball hair who cashed in on being the most corrupt government official ever in a state that has a long history of corruption with reality TV appearances on shows like I'm a Celebrity… Get Me Out of Here! and Celebrity Apprentice, in between giving interviews on virtually every show that'd take him, leading to a handful of hilariously awkward moments where the hosts basically made fun of him to his face but he was too awestruck by the cameras to realize it and/or care — was finally sentenced to jail for his various corruption crimes today.

The verdict: 168-169 months, which breaks down to about fourteen years.

The main crime (besides the aforementioned appearances on reality shows, hiyo!) was trying to auction off Barack Obama's Senate seat (which Barry vacated when he moved his belongings to the White House) to the highest bidder. As you'd imagine, this isn't very legal. Especially when there's plenty of pesky evidence like audio recordings lying around. In any case, have a good trip, sir. In the meantime, maybe work on a few stump speeches for when you get out?

Blago 2025!