President Obama wants to help with your student loans

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Barack Obama

Barack Obama has unveiled a new program meant to ease the burden of student-loan debt, and likely also to appease the scores of unemployed or underemployed recent graduates currently Occupying Wall Street.

Originally meant to begin in 2014 but pushed up to start this year, the initiative will cap monthly loan payments at ten percent of the debtor's current income so that graduates can, say, afford to live somewhere other than their parents' basements. Plus, if the loans still aren't paid off after twenty years, the debt will just go away. Forever!

"These are real savings that will help these graduates get started in their careers and help them make ends meet," said education secretary Arne Duncan

Seeing as no one seems to be able to find a job and the collective student-loan debt in the U.S. hovers around $1 trillion, yes, this is a pretty big help. Maybe it's time for me to head to grad school just for the hell of it?