Rick Santorum asks Google to help him, Google says no

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What do you do when gay-rights activists manage to get a neologism for lube and fecal matter at the top of Google searches for your name? Blame Google.

Instead of, you know, apologizing for being a bigot, Rick Santorum contacted Google yesterday to demand that they remove as the top hit for his name. In case the Senator's insults against Google as irresponsible purveyors of filth didn't work, Santorum also played the (not very effective) "you would never do that to Joe Biden" card. "If something was up there about Joe Biden, they'd get rid of it," he told Politico. (There are a few problems with that comment. Mainly the fact that Joe Biden isn't a homophobe.)

You might have been able to see this one coming, but Google's not taking anything down. A Google spokesperson advised Santorum that if he wants this problem to go away, he "should contact the webmaster of the page directly." But, let's be honest. When this: 

Google results Santorum

is the result of Googling your name, the damage has been done.