Jason Sudeikis on naked women, third nipples and the future of SNL

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Despite the fact that he's on Saturday Night Live and has been co-starring in countless Hollywood comedies lately, it's always a surprise to see Jason Sudeikis being interviewed by major magazines. Perhaps it's because we're used to seeing him perform for just a few dozen people at (admittedly packed) Upright Citizens Brigade improv shows and first really noticed him as Floyd on 30 Rock. In any case, Sudeikis seems like just right comic actor for these populist times — he's the everyman, the normal guy, the dude who dates January Jones and Jennifer Aniston and horny dudes actually appreciate him for stealing "their" women.

If you're not sold yet, you probably will be after these excerpts from his Vanity Fair interview:

[On older women liking his 'stache] I don’t have any specific stories about it, like Helen Mirren hitting on me or anything. But they just looked at me differently. And younger girls definitely didn’t like it…. it’s [like] that funny thing people sometimes do now, when they’re trying to describe an African American person and they refuse to mention that he’s black. They take forever to get to that. “What? Oh yeah, I guess he’s black. I didn’t even notice.”

[On Jennifer Aniston's possible nudity in his upcoming movie] I don't know. All I can tell you is that I won’t be naked. It’s in my nudity riders. I’m only allowed to show the middle of my dick. You know how there’s always that guy at the party who gets naked and jumps in a pool? "Oh look, Dave’s naked again." I’ve never done that move. I don’t even do shirtless comedy.

[On not having a third nipple] It’d be hilarious, though, if I had something like what that guy had tattooed on his stomach in Girl With the Dragon Tattoo. …“I’m a pig and a rapist.” But, come on, how bad can that be, really? I mean yeah, he has that tattoo for the rest of his life, but all he has to do is add "JKLOL" at the bottom and everybody will think it was just a joke.

[On whether he pays attention to tabloid stories about his relationships with Jones and Aniston] I completely pay attention when I’m sleeping with someone. It’s one of the things I’m known for. I’m always super focused on it. Knowing their name, knowing if something’s working. You will never hear otherwise.

Keep reading this Vanity Fair interview to see why everyone from SNL and everyone from Mad Men keep hooking up.