Watch Gary Oldman’s dramatic Jersey Shore recap on Jimmy Kimmel

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What's almost as good as watching the anchorwoman sausage blooper? How about underrated thespian Gary Oldman (finally getting his due for Tinker Tailor) popping in to recap, in dramatic fashion, the exploits of that lovable annoying gang of guidos (can I use that word?) on last Thursday's episode of Jersey Shore.

We've seen this type of Disasterpiece Theater involving Jersey Shore before, most notably when the cast of the Broadway revival of The Importance of Being Earnest had some hilarious, non-earnest fun with show transcripts. (Christopher Walken's take would be priceless.) Violins, bow tie, and British accents still can't change the fact that MTV's juggernaut is now just a sad, redundant smush-a-thon, but redemption is at hand via the collision of highbrow and lowbrow. (Middlebrow?)

Oldman turns in a bravura, straight-faced performance, switching up accents as he describes Snooki's urination issues, Deena's battle with electricity, and The Situation's weird flashing. (Snooki's possible urinary tract infection would make it the most famous UTI since that of Tom Hanks' character in The Green Mile.) If Oldman's film career were to ever go south, he could always fall back on this dramatic reading thing.