Perhaps you remember a little feature we ran a while ago called "Sex Advice From My Grandmother," in which Nerve reader Alison DeNisco's eighty-six-year-old Grandma Carmela dispensed with some time-tested sex and dating advice.

The tidal wave of reactions to Grandma Carmela's advice was rich, varied, and wave-like. Some of you disagreed, some of you agreed, and many of you wished you had such an eloquent, no-nonsense figure in your own life to provide you with answers to your own romantic queries. Well, wish no longer. We've been able to bring Carmela out of retirement for one more round of sex advice, and this time, we're opening the field to you, the Nerve audience. Grandma Carmela will be fielding your questions, with Alison herself providing backup.

So leave your romantic queries in the comments below, or on our Facebook page, or send them to to with "For Grandma Carmela" in the subject line. She's a busy lady, so we can't guarantee that every question will get answered, but rest assured, we will try our best. 

Commentarium (7 Comments)

May 02 12 - 12:58pm

Didn't Jay Leno have an elderly lady who dished out romantic advice? Pretty blunt and hilarious advice as I recall.

May 02 12 - 3:18pm
For Grandma Carmela

No one's given me advice on my problem, so maybe Carmela can throw down some insight:

I'm in a weird situation. I have a long-term boyfriend. Really, really long-term. We've been dating for like 6 years and I feel like I'm falling out of love with him. I don't know if he feels the same way or not. Also there's this new guy who I'm infatuated with. It's totally different with him. So, I don't know if I should work things out with my bf or go for the new guy...HELP GRANDMA

May 02 12 - 3:54pm

THANKS FOR THIS NERVE! Dear Grandma Carmela, i'm 25 and i have a 3 yr old son. my husband is not a particularly sexual person and we sometimes go weeks without intimate contact. he says he is in love with me but is very cold and doesnt act intrested. i've been seeing someone now for about 16 months- he's great but also married ( 44 YRS old) and will never leave his wife. I know I made a bad situation worse-in the original letter you wrote to your granddaughter, you said not to marry a man if there is no passion. What should i do if i now find myself in love with a man who wont be physical with me and i care very deeply for a guy who will NEVER be with me fully? do i leave and stay alone or try to make things happen with the cold fish husband or worse, stay a secret lover to a man who is perfect for me in my head but in reality, is TOTALLY not due to his age and marital status. PLEASE HELP. -Lost in miami

Aug 22 12 - 6:32pm

Do you still need advice? If so I'm working on a show about this topic and would love to discuss this further

May 03 12 - 4:26am

Dear Grandma Carmela

Could you please give us you answer on the age old question "how do i have an orgasm and how can i tell i'm actually having one?"

May 03 12 - 10:19pm

this would be great!

May 04 12 - 12:00am

Grandma Carmela,
What should a woman do if she takes good care of herself (gym, grooming, etc) and yet her husband has put on 30 lbs or so and has a huge gut, but won't diet or work out to lose the weight? I have made gentle jokes about his tummy as has he himself--and his own mother exclaimed "What happened? Why are you so fat!" when she saw him after several months. He actually thinks it's all very hilarious, but I am NOT sexually attracted to him.

Also: I worry about his health and have made suggestions for improving his cardiovascular condition. I cook healthy dinners, but he eats burgers and takeout at work! I try to get him to work out when our kids go to judo classes, and I work out in the weight room during their class, but he chooses to read instead.

He is insinuating there is something wrong with me and maybe I need medication for my "problem" (ie not being aroused by him), but he doesn't understand, no matter how much I nudge him, that he is not appealing to me in his present condition. My libido is fine: I just don't want to have sex with him anymore.