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Links: Anarchist dog-walking is officially a thing, according to the New York Times

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Personally, I think anarchists are cute. Not in a puppy dog kind of way, but in a kind of condescending, "Oh you actually think that will work" kind of way. But anarchist dog-walkers? That are conflicted about the inherent dominance in domesticated animals? Come the fuck on, people — how and why is that even a thing that deserves any level of attention, he asked rhetorically in a column expressly designed to draw attention to things?

Shotguns are wonderful. Have you ever held one? It makes you feel like an automatic badass, and the temptation to just pose for hours is nearly overwhelming. However, Sean Murphy clearly feels that the medical applications of shotguns are just beginning to explored, having succumbed to the temptation to remove a wart on his finger with a 12-gauge that he happened to find in his bushes one day.

Is your urine worth $36,000? One gentleman in Oregon had that question answered with a resounding "yes" recently, when, after he casually urinated in a reservoir, the local government drained the entire thing. You'd think that in Oregon the main concern would be whether the urine was free-range and certified organic.

One of my biggest problems with Facebook has always been the relative lack of tapestries. I just… love… tapestries. And so does Erin M. Riley, whose woven versions of hilariously inappropriate Facebook pictures (bong rips in front of Linkin Park posters, anyone?) are tastefully immortalized versions of shameful memories.