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Be honest: what do you usually do after wasting a few hours on Facebook? If your answer is, "brush the Cheeto crumbs off the front of my shirt and play a rousing game of Six Degrees of Zac Efron on Wikipedia," then you were probably not involved with the making of the "Thank You Facebook" song, an ebullient paean to the social networking site that went viral after it was posted on YouTube a few days ago.
As you can probably tell from the title, the artists behind "Thank You Facebook - Dedicated to its FB IPO" are really, really, really big fans of Facebook. In fact, lyricist Deborah Torres Patel is so grateful to Facebook for "bringing to me/my friends and family" and "the world community" that she was inspired to film an upbeat, multi-cultural tribute to the site starring Facebook fans from all corners of the world, including Singapore, Italy, the UK, and Australia. The result can pretty much only be described as what would happen if a Miracle Whip commercial and a 1970s Coca-Cola ad had a three-way with Michael Jackson's "Black and White" video (a YouTube commenter put it more succinctly by comparing it to a Christian rock song, "but with Facebook in the place of God").
Anyway, here's "Thank You Facebook," in all its cheesy, earworm-y glory. If the lyrics "I'm tagging you, you're tagging me/we're making history" somehow inspire you to befriend random Australians and reconnect with long-lost friends and family members, more power to you, but as for me, goddamn if it doesn't make me kind of want to slap Mark Zuckerberg right in the face.