True Stories: Brazilian Girls - Nerve.com




              


We worked our way up from the beach, fighting through the crowd. It turned out she was a twenty-eight-year-old schoolteacher from the slums outside São Paulo. She taught Portuguese grammar and composition to 150 fifth-graders who cycled through her classroom in batches of about forty. They were mostly favela kids, poor and tough, with hard lives. Many had drugged-out parents or were on drugs themselves. To teach them, she said, she'd had to learn to be tough.

"Tough enough to teach me?" I asked. (I know, gag, right? But it was all I could manage with my Portuguese.)

Ana smiled. "If you want."

I nodded. "Eu quero."

She shook her head. "Nao, it's not 'key-er-o.' That's Spanish. KYER-o."

And so it began. I led her away through the crowd, down along the street and back to the beach. We walked out on the rocks and sat down, looking into the water. A crab was skittering along the bottom of one of the tidal pools.

"How do you call that?" I asked, pointing. I had my arm around her, and she was snuggling into my side.

"Caranguejo," she said. "Kar-ahn-GWAY-joo. A good word to learn proper pronunciation. Say it."

You have got to be kidding me, I thought, but I repeated it.

She shook her head. "No. Again."

Somewhere in the far recesses of my brain, my friends were yelling, "Dude! You're in!"
I said it again. Wrong. She started to give me a lecture on phonetics. Midway through I touched her arm and asked if she wanted to kiss me, and she said yes, why not. We made out for a while, and she pulled away. She said, "You kiss differently than a Brazilian. You do it rhythmically."

I started to apologize, but she put her hand over my mouth. She thought for a second. "I didn't say bad. Just different. I like it."

We made out for a while longer, until the tide had come up over the rocks and was lapping at our feet. "Let's go," she said.

"Where?"

She shrugged. "Anywhere."

We walked off, still talking. I referred to her as my profesor, which I instantly realized was masculine. She laughed and said, "Profesora. I'm a woman." She touched her crotch. "There won't be any surprises there, when . . ."

She looked at me as though realizing what she'd just said, then started giggling.

Somewhere in the far recesses of my brain, my friends were yelling, "Dude! You're in!"




I was not in that night. The next, as I walked with her away from a free concert, Ana said, "This is all just bread and circuses. We have nothing, so we celebrate, we sing, we dance to forget that we have no food on the table."

"Bread and circuses?" I said.

"Yes. If we can't comer, we comer." She laughed. "Oh, another one of my piadas pornagraficas, my pornographic jokes . . ."

I frowned. "If we can't eat, we eat?"

She shook her head. "No. It's also the same as transar, to have sex. Like, yesterday I ate the most tasty pizza, or yesterday I . . ."

She colored slightly.

"Ate the most tasty girl?" I suggested.

"," she said. "That's it. But you don't pronounce the 'r' at the end of the infinitive. Come-gh."



              

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79 Comments

Haha, makes me want to learn Portuguese!! Good read, good read.

LS commented on 06/04

any sex story that makes me want a fuck is a success. this story was a success.

jj commented on 06/04

OK, my first comment on the new Nerve format: If you have a multi-page article, please put all the comments on the last page only. Otherwise, they sometimes have spoilers in them. Thanks!

JCF commented on 06/04

Seriously, i just want to go to Rio now. NOW. leaving cubicle in 5...

TP commented on 06/04

zzzz zzzzzzz zzzzzzz

nn commented on 06/04

I went to Brasil on vacation 6 years ago, and found the man of my dreams. (We're now married.) It's true, kissing is as common as shaking hands, at least in Rio. I made-out with 5 other guys before kissing the man who would become my husband. lol Oh! And another American myth...I never saw one woman topless on a Brasilian beach. The bikinis may be tiny, but topless is definitely frowned upon.

HS commented on 06/04

Sounds worth all the trouble. Brazilians are the most arrogantly sexy people in the world, but I'd give anything...

phm commented on 06/04

Excellent story.

Jcr commented on 06/04

hot : )

dj commented on 06/04

Her name was Victoria. We started chatting online, on an industry forum. Trade gossip soon turned to personal notes, ambitions, family, our upbringings... her unhappy marriage, mine.... The dialog endured for nearly two years, becoming increasingly important, 'virtual' and all though it was. Touch was impossible, but words have power, even on an instant messenger. One day she said, my company is sending me to Chicago to sign a contract, isn't that your city? I could stay an extra few days. My heart thumped like a machine gun... I stood at the arrivals gate, unsure anyone could be as beautiful in real life as in the pictures. The connecting flight from Rio arrived.. she emerged, ravishing, innocent, trusting, alive with dark beauty and glittering smiles. In the cab she took my hand, looked deeply in my eyes and said "before anything more happens i must tell you, I cannot stay here, I must to back to my children, to... my situation...". I said, I know, my "situation" is the same. She rested her head on my shoulder for the drive to the hotel, in silence, our fingers intertwined. As we stood naked in front of each other she said, quite guilelessly, "have you ever made love with a Brazilian woman?" No, I confessed. She smiled, and we slipped into each others' arms even as we fell gently on to the bed. And all I can say about making love with her is..... it was different. Once in a lifetime.... Words run out at this point. Maybe I'll play you a song some day. We both cried at the airport. Tears of pride, joy, sorrow, longing, hope, and yes, of love. But not tears of regret.

MJQ commented on 06/04

That was pretty hot, I gotta get some Brasilian love now!

BH commented on 06/04

Rather than stereotype the sexuality of an entire country--shame on all of you--I highly recommend that more thought be given to what this objectification feels like for Brazilian women who are functioning under an incredibly chauvinistic set of gender roles. (Who likes having a Brazilian wax?) There is an entire body of academic literature examining Brazilian sexuality. For further reading, you could start here: http://www.guttmacher.org/media/nr/2006/05/15/index.html.

AMM commented on 06/05

Good piece, Saul. I gather you avoided the "garotas de programa" entirely. They're not everyone's cup of tea, but they do open another window on Brazil's sexuality. Joe Diamond author, "Around the World in 80 Lays"

JD commented on 06/05

as a veteran of brazilian porn, i hesitate to judge a people on your one experience. get back out there, man

dwp commented on 06/06

AMM: Fuck off with your po-mo Gloria Steinham shit. *I* enjoy getting Brazilians. I do it even when I'm single - as do friends of mine. People generalize all the time about entire nations: Americans are fat, the English are uptight, Brazilians are sexy and unhibited. We all know these don't apply 100% of the time!

BB1 commented on 06/06

During muy youth a spent a lot of time in Rio and Bahia, trying to take to bed pretty Brazilian girls. There is one golden rule: Engage in a kind conversation, be nice and funny, but no kisses, and no fondling. In a few hours she would take you to bed. But it you start touching here, she would lose interest and that would be all.

fje commented on 06/06

You know, as a brazilian girl I can say that his experience was, actually, what happens to anyone around here. Native or not. I think that we are simply more open about sex. We talk about it with friends, we talk about it on TV. We know that some things lead to sex, and we're OK with that. What's the problem, if you want it? Of course, like the girl in this article, I would happily lay an american for the novelty of it. You might call it objectification, but I call it sexual curiosity.

LL commented on 06/07

Loved this story. Cute.

LLB commented on 06/07

I wish I were Brazilian.

LMD commented on 06/08

Either you went to Salt Lake City by mistake, or had a face full of running zits. When I was there, the girls were invariably hot to trot, anytime, anywhere, anyway. They are easily the most hot-blooded, slutty girls on the planet.

jtr commented on 06/08

pretty good story - pretty bad portuguese.

AG commented on 06/08

ahahaha. I'm from Brazil and I can tell u its waaaaay easier to get laid in US than here... I lived in US before and man, those girls are easy... here the girls are players... they think they're the last coke bottle in the desert... specially in the south of the country. If you wanna get laid in Brazil and u're not from over here, either u pay for it or expect a hard time gettin some. unless u know what clubs to go... clubs that usually "gringos" don't go. Blend with the locals and then when they find out u're not from here they will treat u way better... u just gotta know where to go... u went to the wrong places... Rio is not a good place for turists to get laid without effort... or money....

DMR commented on 06/09

n.y.c. honorary brasilian, I've lived in Brasil and personally I don't believe the story> As the brasilian guy stated, if your a tourist the first line of women you meet are the prostitutes, because you really don't know where to go to meet the straight women who are not selling themselves just to survive. Then if you meet a straight woman(not a prostitute) I believe it will take more than two casual dates to get laid, unless she is blasted out of her mind on drugs or alchohol. Brazilian women are sexually libral,however, they are also very conceited and yet not in a stand-offish way like American women. I like Brasilian women on a social level but I don't think I would marry one, unless she was very religous and if that was the case I don't think she would make herself that available to a foreigner. Of course this is just my opinion! VIVA BRASIL!

s.v. commented on 06/10

Dude, you're in!!

GW commented on 06/12

Fun story. But your Portuguese is misspelled, you should have fixed that out of respect for Ana.

SI commented on 06/15

your portuguese stinks. sorry.

BS commented on 06/17

that was amazing learn some portuguese but well done you got down to the main objective big ups.

JN commented on 07/29

Why travel out of the country to get laid? I get plenty in the good old US of A. Any first time experience with a horny willing woman is erotic. Just my take on things.

DC commented on 07/31

I just want to say I find Latinas very attractive. It is possible to have the lovemaking without the crudeness.

RM commented on 11/01

@dj If you were forced to starve for 3 days and then given a pack of saltine crackers that would be the best goddamn you ever had in your life. But really it is only a bag of crackers..

AS commented on 11/11

Yeah...I don't really buy this story. I'm a brazilian woman and a lot of us don't just give it away just like that. Unless of course, like someone said earlier, that the girl was extremely high or wasted. There's not way. the only thing about sex is that we are open about it. It's like talking about food.

MM commented on 11/15

RIDICULOUS. Im a brazilian woman and Im very hurted with this sexist blog!

SAA commented on 11/15

WHAT A JERK !!!! STROLLING LATE OF NIGHT IN PORTO DA BARRA, ONE COULD FIND ONLY ONE KIND OF WOMAN : PROSTITUTE (a.k.a PIRIGUETE). Gringos think they are very smart, but they are just STUPID GRINGOS that can be easily cheated by women. Stupid hahahahaha!

SAG commented on 11/15

You are all a bunch of pervert idiots. You don´t need to travel so far to get laid off. You have the most pervert ones very close to you. The cheaters are right there....

MeM commented on 11/15

I'm a brazilian girl. Specifically from Rio. I gotta agree with you, when you say that most of foreign men have this idea of Brasil. That's mostly what Carnaval is about. And yes, women and MEN behave like that. But i must say. NOT ALL OF THEM. What do you expect to find, in the places u've been? Do you expect to find someone nice to talk, not only to 'make out' in the middle of a club? I would find as discuting people in USA, depending on where i would be. But in such a big country, with 191.480.630 people, if you use your inteligence, you'll know that not even HALF of that number is what you are saying. We are also a people who struggle to survive in a country who has its difficulties. Families that still can smile even if they have just enough to survive, with no comfort at all. A country with a rich culture, beautiful nature, and respectful people. Maybe u're not gonna find those people. Maybe you are just to busy looking for a prostitute. What a shame. But next time, don't spent your precious money - I'm sure u worked hard to get it. Please dont come if all you want is to help to increase the issues of my country. And surely you won't offend a nation like you just did. I just dont understand how you americans, can even be upset when the countries of the world doesnt like you. Its not really my case, because i have wonderful friends in there. And your offending and sureal post is not as big, as the rest of the good things i see in your people.Thanks for your attention. Rc.

Rc commented on 11/15

"Your glasses remind me Sartre" hahahahahahah what a ridiculous flirting!!! Only a prostitute would say it!!!! You should thank God she didnt robbed you...

JH commented on 11/15

It's really, you did not attend good places! Were you with little money?? Women of this type, you will find anywhere in the world, and willing to spend money from a jerk like you!!!! Go find God, because you should need is...

LD commented on 11/16

You did not have to travel far to get it! E.U also has the prostitute! Do not generalize saying that in Brazil there is only so ... In Brazil there are also women whores and descent and honest, as with any country except the U.S. that the majority are so liberal you stupid Americans have even sick of so putaria! They are idiots like you that shame class male! My god, that text ridiculous! Much shit!

LS commented on 11/16

Idiot, go to Brazil just to have sex? Proof that the Brazilians are not what you think is that this idiot could only have sex with one! And yet a prostitute, because a normal Brazilian does not behave accordingly, they behave like prostitutes! Should have beaten and robbed of her pimp to learn to not be so stupid!

CC commented on 11/16

Beautiful girls in Brazil... Peace, man

EOR commented on 11/16

Coitado de voce kkkkkk

j commented on 11/16

I found this article somewhat funny, entertaining, and a little sad. And I say that as a Brazilian woman. Everywhere you go in the world will have sluts, prudes and everything in between. None are exclusive to any one place.

AT commented on 11/16

Cara, teu português é uma bosta! Você não aprendeu nada...

JG commented on 11/17

idiota... :P... arruma uma prostituta e ainda acha que se deu bem no Brasil... vá te catar!!!

cb commented on 11/17

http://thebrazilianexperience.tumblr.com/

ddd commented on 11/17

http://thebrazilianexperience.tumblr.com/ wow..now that is something..hmmm

adsf commented on 11/17

You do pronounce the r at the end of the infinitive... At least here in Portugal where we speak actual Portuguese. Other than that, you gotta love Brazil

MT commented on 11/18

http://thebrazilianexperience.tumblr.com/ That's true stories, man!!!

luv commented on 11/18

Silly, idiot, stupid! only a prostitute to want you! You are nothing!

k commented on 11/18

I went to USA with one goal: (1) to not get shoot by a crazy man that killed all his colegues.

GLO commented on 11/19

GREAT TUTORIAL TO HAVE SEX IN BRAZIL. I'm a Brazilian man and I have to agree with big part--if not all-- that you've said. I'm here to explain brazilian's behavior. The kiss description was perfect, "it's like shaking hands, but a little more". We rather kiss first than touching intimate parts, different from you(so I've heard). I can have plenty of sex with brazilian girls for one reason: i've born here. The 'gringos' always came here wanting just sex. Brazilian girls are hot, but not whores(some are). It's easy to have sex, but you need to be respectful and, like you said, we go a lot to motels so you must have the TIMMING to "mandar a real" (make the approach). What do I mean? You must say it in the right time, with right words at the right place. The way I do: Let's suppose you are on a night club. You've dance a lot, have already kissed and talked a lot, than you start to slip your hands slowly from her back to the top of her ass. Lightly, like you were supporting your hands. The next step is to say the right words, pay attention: "eu estou cansado daqui, vamos para um lugar mais calmo?". This mean something like: "I'm a little bit tired, shall we go to a more peaceful place?". She agreed! Yey! Calm down, that's not guaranteed yet. Get out of the place, that's the harder part, you must say it. I recommend to use humor, usually I say: "I know a good quiet place were we can relax--look with a provocative smile before complete--and also we can have breakfast. THAT'S IT. She'll probably say no at the first, we call that "fazer doce" (means to want sex but say no at first to doesn't seem to whore). Use your charm, be nice, do never use force and probably you'll get laid!!! I HOPE YOU ENJOY AND STOP WITH THIS STEREOTYPE.

ALX commented on 11/19

As a brazilian girl, I think this Ana was too easy... She was, probably, a prostitute. What was that henna tattoo thing? That's totally a bitch-thing! If she was not a prostitute, she was probably too ugly to get laid with a brazilian man. Probably she was "a perigo"...

Bia commented on 11/19

Brazilians mans say that it's way more easy to get laid with an american girl than with a brazilian girl. But of course the sex is not as good.

A.C. commented on 11/19

Muito bom! O gringo se deu mal!

CAS commented on 11/19

Just because you found yourself an easy girl, it doesn´t mean that you can generalize that, and “ perpetuate the stereotype of Brazilian women as horny and sex-obsessed”. As you could see for your own experience, it´s too hard to get into the pants of most Brazilians, but of course, it´s a huge country, and ‘putas’ are all over the place. Just like in your own country. (which by the way makes me think: why can´t this guy get laid over there?!!). I hope at least you remembered to protect yourself, cause just as Bia commented over here, probably Ana was a “perigo”, which means too risky. Good luck to you. greetings from another brazilian.

Dri commented on 11/19

Dude epic! I think it's all a matter of knowing where to go... Having a brazilian friend/player would totally hook u up!

DPZ commented on 11/19

Hey mates, you can say that kind of stuff. I, as a brazilian guy, I'd think the same. Things got crazy here, but the REAL STUFF I'd say you is that these things don't happen only if you when you come here. It's the same freaking shit that happens with us when we travel abroad. We though about the british girls, the american girls, blah blah blah. Don't think it's easier for you then it is for us, cuz the different always comes to mind of every kind of girl. The kiss thing for us is the same as a BJ for you. So don't paint, our girls are whores, cuz yours are as well. I just hope everybody have fun and enjoy life, with responsability, only. I just got some good stories from my trip to Europe and probably will get some other stories to tell my friends when I go to Florida or California next spring break, cuz that's what everybody want, some good sex story to share with their friends. Regs!

OC commented on 11/19

Haha ... I found this cool story, I hope one day to have my American ... also sorry for my bad english =] Haha...Achei bem legal essa história, espero um dia ter meu americano também...desculpe pelo meu ingles ruim =]

Naty commented on 11/19

I know where u can find sex a lot...in ur house,motherfucker!!!!

Devi commented on 11/19

You came here, got a prostitute, paid her so many drinks, took 3 days to get laid with her and you think you are the king? Man, gimme a break!!! your portuguese sucks! YOU suck! Looser bastard...

ELR commented on 11/19

I am a Brazilian woman and after reading this text, I found only one thing: American women are very bad at the same sex. For a man to be dazzled with both a history, it is because the sex they leave much to be desired. We Brazilian women have much to teach them.

Paty commented on 11/19

The cultural difference between Brazil and the United States is immense. We Brazilians we see sexuality differently from you and that does not mean that our way is better or worse than yours. It's just different. Stop the judge extends from the cultural point of view of you. First understand our culture, and then create a view with concrete basement and not only based on data reported by the media.

Paty commented on 11/19

@elr: i'm pretty sure the author doesn't think he's "the king." judging from this flare-up, maybe self-deprecation doesn't really translate.

tmp commented on 11/19

Brazilian girls are hot!!!

PF commented on 11/19

lol -> "We say in São Paolo that drinking without toasting is seven years without giving yourself to anyone." I wonder how she would translate "Toasting without drinking is seven years without .."

VHL commented on 11/20

I went to the US with 2 goals: not to be killed by some psycho , and find some girl not so fat so I can have sex.

MV commented on 11/20

auhaeuhauehuah Quer sexo fácil? Então pague! (Do you want easy sex? Pay it.

Ntx commented on 11/20

Im 27 years old Brazilian. I lived in europe (Portugal, Spain, UK and Austria) 4 times, for no longer than a year each time. I strongly disagree if the idea we r more open to talk about sex or to do it. We all now generalize, its stupid. But, since my first time abroad, I´ve being asking myself: Where does it come from? Why do they say Brazilian girls r sex machine or anyth like that... Mayb thast the image we r selling. But for sure its not true. Comparing to Americans and British... I prefer not saying cos I´d be generalizing... But I just want to say: thats not true. We r not all sexy, looking for the next guy to fuck ou even to kiss. I´ve never kissed a gringo. (OK, there is one I regret not to, hehehe). And not that I didnt have the oportunnity. So if u came here and had the chance to go to bed with a girl who was looking for a gringo, good for u. But as u said, its not the rule. And the image someone its trying to sell this not the real picture.

AISL commented on 11/20

Your portuguese sucks.

UHX commented on 11/20

Baby, it was a prostitute, or a really, really ugly girl. Try to get laid with a pretty one, so you'll see what's a hard time...

CFT commented on 11/20

Dude, you should have gone to Rio. My first trip to Rio I got laid by 15 different girls in 10 days.

HFD commented on 11/21

Moron. Then Americans wonder why the whole world hates them.

DD commented on 11/21

hahaha it's funny reading this being a brazillian girl. sad, but also funny. look, I was virgin until I was 24, but I've kissed a lot before and surely I'd kissed a cute and nice gringo if I had a chance. But thinking the same thing that girl said. I have had an adventure kissing a foreign guy to tell my friend. Just that. But it's different if the guy will stay here for a long time, we can be friends, then more than friends maybe...

MM commented on 11/22

im a brazilian woman and i must say that this girl was easy. she was probably a prostitute.

medq commented on 11/23

I'm from RIO and i think that this fame of brazilian girls be easy to get laid is cause u gringos dont understand "how this girl could be so hot and dont be a sex machine or a prostitute".And then whats happens is that 90 % of the gringos only have sex with "professionals" .Let Me Give U a advice : Dont get girls at the beaches at night like in the "calçadão de copacabana" very ugly bitches.

PMF commented on 11/23

about the history above, the girl should be very poor and ugly and not hot and black. Why u gringos come to brazil and only fuck black girls MAN we have the hottest blondes and brunettes in the world(u dont see blondes with real big and no fat bundas(ass) in the us)

PMF commented on 11/23

A very important detail is that cities like salvador or rio are big cities (rj have more than 7 million people)so the majority of the persons in the city is not trippin like u gringos that came her looking for fun.You Know We are in our routine not only thinking in sex like when we are travelling.So my advice is go to travelling places like buzios or angra dos reis, both in rio or any place in bahia excepting salvador.

UGAY commented on 11/23

0x0 in 2 weeks??? you are soooo loser !!!!

lala commented on 11/24

take a look at this end learn: http://thebrazilianexperience.tumblr.com/

ccb commented on 11/26
 

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