Quantcast
Link To: Home
 
featured personal

search articles
Untitled Document

media blogs

photo blogs

Rose & Olive
Houston neighbors pull back the curtains and expose each other’s lives.
Scanner
Your daily cup of WTF?
Date Machine
Putting your baggage to good use.
The Modern Materialist
Almost everything you want.
The Daily Siege
An intimate and provocative look at Siege's life, work and loves.
The Nerve Blog-a-log
Autumn Sonnichsen
A fashionable L.A. photo editor exploring all manner of hyper-sexual girls down south.
ScreenGrab
The Nerve Film Blog
Chase
The creator of Supercult.com poses his pretty posse.
The Remote Island
Nerve's TV blog.
61 Frames Per Second
Smarter gaming.
ScreenGrab
The Nerve Film Blog
Brandonland
A California boy in L.A. capturing beach parties, sunsets and plenty of skin.

new this week
Screengrab by Various
Today in Nerve's film blog: Holiday special - 35 people, places and movies we're thankful for.
The Remote Island by Bryan Christian
Michael Phelps indulges Anderson Cooper in some watersports and Dexter makes a 'bitch move.' Plus: the secret of Tina Fey's scar, revealed!
The 40 Greatest Lost Icons in Pop Culture History by Suzanne LaBarre and Tommy Craggs
Where were they ever?
Dating Confessions by You
"I'm wearing sexy underwear while talking to you online so that I feel confident enough to tell you that I'm into you."
Scanner by Emily Farris
Today on Nerve's culture blog: We bring you more Dita Von Teese from the German Playboy.
Nature Nurtured by Alexander Bergström
The body makes the scene, the scene makes the body. /photography/
Dating Advice From . . . Engineers by Steph Auteri
Q. For optimal functionality, what should go into a first-date emergency kit? A. Fine wine, road flares, a snake-bite kit and Ghirardelli chocolates.
61 Frames Per Second by John Constantine
Today in Nerve's videogame blog: Giving thanks with The Last Guy, echochrome, and Pixeljunk: Eden.
 REGULARS
The Lisa Diaries by Lisa Carver  
  Index
Introduction


Love!
April 8, 1999


I guess it's weird that I like to watch my boyfriend on top of another woman. I want him so much: I want to eat him, I want to be him. If I can sort of have him through the whole world having him (or at least an occasional third), I'm closer to fulfilling my crazy desire. At one point Simone was on top of Dave on the bed and I was across the room on the telephone, watching them. It was just like Dave and I were alone in the room, like we were in high school and he was on the football team and I was a cheerleader and we were on a date and we would get married when we graduated. It was like we were having a sweet conversation about what the clouds looked like; it was like pure falling in love. Maybe Simone felt it too, felt talked over, because she said just then that she felt like a pawn. I was impressed with her honesty, but a little baffled by it. If I ever felt like a pawn, I would never admit it. I would look for ways to change the situation, get on top again. I like games. I like when reality shifts. Mostly, I love to watch Dave make the moves on someone. He's so sly and confusing and seductive and a little mean. I feel like his conspirator. He holds my interest; he's always twisting out of who I think he is. And it's always enjoyable. Actually, it's not. I take it back. Sometimes I cry. It's captivating, that's what it always is.







©1999 Lisa Carver and Nerve.com
promotion


partner links
sponsored links
EDUN LIVE
Ethical tees. 10% off with code AFRICA


Advertisers, click here to get listed!


advertise on nerve | affiliate program | home | photography | personal essays | fiction | dispatches | video | opinions | regulars | search | personals | horoscopes | retronerve | NerveShop | about us |

account status
| login | join | TOS | help

©2008 Nerve.com, Inc.