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Dating Advice from . . . Voiceover Artists

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Brian, 30
http://www.myspace.com/berrebbi

What’s the best way to sound sexy on the phone?

You know how you can hear it when a person is smiling? It literally changes the tone of your voice. You use different muscles. Same goes for posture. Lie down, turn the lights low and voila.

This girl I’m dating still lives with her ex-boyfriend. Am I wrong to be weirded out by that?

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It’s totally weird, especially if she didn’t preface telling you this with, "Hey, this is really going to weird you out." If you date her, you’re probably going to meet him. And how are you ever going to go back to her place to do it? The levels of awkwardness multiply.

My boyfriend of three months lost his job on the day I was planning to break up with him. Am I obligated to stay with him until he gets a new one?

Getting a job can take forever. Break it off, and if you really feel guilty, write him a check.

I told my date about my blog. Now I’m paranoid he’s checking it, and I can’t write as freely as I’d like to. What should I do?

There’s this new thing called Google. When you start dating someone, they use it to find out about you — your MySpace, Facebook, Flickr, YouTube, blog and the Battlestar Galactica theories you post on message boards. In other words, he would have found it anyway. Take this as an opportunity to sneak a sexy inside joke into your blog just for him.

My friends and I always talk about our sexual exploits. When I told my boyfriend this, he requested I not share such information. I feel like what he doesn’t know won’t hurt him, plus sometimes I need advice. Is this wrong?

One night, use some new crazy sexual maneuver on him, and afterward, when he’s all sweaty and exhausted, tell him it’s a move your friends told you about during one of these conversations.

Jon, 33
http://www.fatbellycreative.com


I get so nervous on first dates that I don’t act like myself at all. I try to show off and end up making a fool of myself. How can I relax and act normal?

I used to be a radio DJ and would try to sound cool on the air. I’d try so hard I’d stutter like a fool. But once I began doing the show to entertain myself and just have fun, everything was better. The same could be applied to dating.

How can I impress a voiceover artist?

Aside from being Mel Blanc’s granddaughter? Have a good career, a sharp wit and a very un-Mel Blanc-like pair of legs.

My friends and I always talk about our sexual exploits. When I told my boyfriend this, he requested I not share such information. I feel like what he doesn’t know won’t hurt him, plus sometimes I need advice. Is this wrong?

Assuming you trust your friends to keep a lid on it, there’s nothing wrong with it. The mistake was telling him in the first place. But now that you’ve told him, lie. He’ll be happier, and it’s your life to share with your friends if you want to.

What’s the best way to sound sexy on the phone?

One of the first things voiceover people learn is not to listen to the sound of their own voices. Forget "sounding" sexy — be sexy, dammit!


The girl I’m dating still lives with her ex-boyfriend. Am I wrong to be weirded out by that?

Are you kidding? I’m weirded out. There are too many opportunities here for either justified or unjustified jealousy. If you mean to keep it purely physical, go crazy, but we all know rebound dating isn’t an avenue to romantic bliss.

Jenna, 24
http://www.mainspringcollective.com

I hate my girlfriend’s voice. How can I get past this?

Get over it, or get a new girlfriend. The sound of someone’s voice is very much a part of who they are. If you really like her, give yourself a chance to get used to it. If you don’t eventually consider it an endearing part of who she is, there’s not much you can do about it.

My boyfriend of three months lost his job on the day I was planning to break up with him. Am I obligated to stay with him until he gets over this?

I don’t think so. It’ll be worse trying to hold together a relationship that’s not working while he’s in a funk, and breaking up later on — after he’s grown to depend on you in his time of need — could be more hurtful in the long run.

This girl I’m dating still lives with her ex-boyfriend. Am I wrong to be weirded out by that?

Because of the ridiculous cost of living in some cities, that situation is more common than you’d think. I have quite a few friends who live with their exes. It depends on the nature of their relationship and how much confidence you have in yours.

I told my date about my blog. Now I’m paranoid he’s checking it, and I can’t write as freely as I’d like to. What should I do?

The thing about writing about your life on the internet is that it’s completely accessible to the general public, including the people you date. You should either continue uncensored, or re-evaluate how much of your personal life you want to be stating to the world.

How can I impress a voiceover artist?

Excellent diction and a love of cartoons.

Dave, 19




My boyfriend of three months lost his job on the day I was planning to break up with him. Am I obligated to stay with him until he gets over his job loss?

You’re a compassionate person to consider the impact this would have on him, but it won’t kill him. It will only make him stronger and more determined. And obviously you don’t like him, and his work doesn’t like him — maybe he needs to wise up and learn the hard way.

My boyfriend loves doing accents. The problem is, they’re not good or funny, and it’s embarrassing when he breaks them out in front of other people. How do I tell him to stop without hurting his feelings?

Tell him to go to his local radio station and apply for a job as a voiceover artist. He can vent his desire to impersonate within the confines of a soundproof booth.

I made out with a guy while I was hammered and gave him my phone number. He called the next day and asked me out. How should I act on our date to show him I’m classier than that?

Rather than putting on your classy face, be yourself. Obviously he liked the girl who enjoys getting totally hammered and making out.

When I told my boyfriend about my last relationship, I neglected to tell him that it was actually an engagement that I called off. How do I bring that up without looking like a liar?

Just get it off your chest. What’s the worst that could happen? He will almost surely reassure you that it’s fine, and appreciate the fact that you chose him over your ex-husband-to-be.

My friends and I always talk about our sexual exploits. When I told my boyfriend this, he requested that I not share such information. I feel like what he doesn’t know won’t hurt him, plus sometimes I need advice. Is this wrong?

It’s natural for you to converse with your best friends about your sexual adventures. He’s probably is afraid he may not be performing and doesn’t want to feel embarrassed in front of your friends. Reassure him that he’s fantastic in bed.
 

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by Anna Davies.
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