The Remote Island by Bryan Christian Today on Nerve's TV blog: Dance, Hipster, Dance! Plus: our latest NewsCrush — and why one army brat is breaking up with Army Wives.
REGULARS
posted 2/25/2008
FEB 25-MAR 2
Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)
They say what goes up, must come down — it's a simple law of gravity. But this week, you're going to wish you lived on a planet without a natural pull to its core. Sure, last week was like walking on air, but this one's going to be like swimming in a swamp when complications arise at work. Keep an eye on your bank account, and trust no one.
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Pisces (Feb. 19-Mar. 20)
As creative as you are, your mind tends to skitter about like a freewheeling carrier pigeon. However, with Saturn and the Sun engaged in what amounts to an astrological cage match, now is not the time to screw around — especially in your normally hectic love life. Because much like the noble carrier pigeon, some things lose relevance with time, and it's up to you to decide whether to keep pursuing someone who already flown the coop.
Aries (Mar. 21-Apr. 19)
You're used to just rubbing up against people until they cave and shower you with adoration. But it's going to take more than just workin' it to get your life in order this week. This means you might actually have to back down if your special friend isn't responding to your sexy overtures. Not everybody's equipped to deal with your fiery brand of sweet love, and you need to hold out for someone who is.
Taurus (Apr. 20-May 20)
Who doesn't love lying back in their pajamas, letting the world float by like so many butterflies? Well, you, for one. Though you usually shoulder your way through business and pleasure like you're rushing to catch the express train, the repercussions of last week's eclipse are going find you needing a little more down time. Think of it this way: the less time you spend in the hustle and bustle, the more time you have to mix it up with new toys and recent lovers.
Gemini (May 21-Jun. 21)
You know as well as anyone that "leading a balanced life" doesn't mean "drinking like memory retention is going out of style," but that doesn't usually stop you from hitting the hooch. But in light of last week's lunar eclipse, you're going to find fewer reasons to maintain your usual weekend blitzkrieg. Whether it's a sexy stranger returning your lost mittens or a longtime love bringing over some snuggles and snacks, these are things you'll want to remember.
Cancer (June 21-July 21)
Shaking your moneymaker comes easily to you, Cancer — you've got the perfect blend of charisma, street smarts and pathos to get what you want. Problem is, other people may not be as committed to the all-important goal of you getting yours. So if you feel you're owed something — be it rent from a roommate, a raise from your boss, or a long-ago-promised wine-and-dine — take the opportunity towards the end of the week to cash in.
Leo (July 22-Aug. 22)
The graceless conversational fumbling, the tensely desperate undercurrent to every pause, the awkward handshake goodbye/stealthy morning-after escape — nobody likes the thought of being set up. But your friends are your friends for a reason, Leo. And if they're smart enough to be your buddy, it's possible they know other charming, fantastic people, too. So if a dear friend keeps hinting about some coworker of theirs who you'd just love, get fierce and give it a shot.
Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 21)
It's hard to feel especially sexy when you've got the sniffles and are in perpetual need of a nap. So even though you're usually inclined to run yourself ragged with social engagements, lay off until the beginning of March. Spend time sipping detox tea and remembering to eat breakfast in the mornings. Last week was a challenge, and you need to rest up for the next one — you can't fully tap into your inner burlesque dancer if you space out and forget your pasties.
Libra (Sept. 22-Oct. 22)
She may be caught up in controversy once again after posing nude for some Marilyn Monroe revival pics, but other than that, Lohan seems to be staying out of trouble after her last stint in rehab. You should follow suit. With all your other cosmos in line, there's no better time to quit that nasty habit of yours — smoking? Drinking? Nail-biting? Nose-picking? — once and for all.
Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)
You may be focused on business pursuits at the moment, or waiting to jump into a new financial endeavor, but this week you're going to need to clear your schedule for that special someone. Whether its tragedy, hurt feelings or a major meltdown, you can't forget you're the cheese to someone's macaroni, and that mac is in need of some serious time on the spinning microwave platter with you.
Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)
February 24 has hit you hard, Sag. Spend a little time by yourself. Run a hot bath and read that dusty book of Jewel poetry; watch How I Met Your Mother reruns on TiVo. In short, do whatever it takes to feel re-energized for March. It's like spring cleaning for your eternal soul a few months early.
Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)
The loving planets have aligned serendipitously for you, Caps. Yup, the last week of February is like a Nora Ephron comedy sans the treacly Lifetime dialogue and scrunchy facial contortions from Meg Ryan. With your sheer magnetism, you'll be able to lure even the most wayward stranger. The key is to remain optimistic and submerse yourself in good vibes.
