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Jack’s Naughty Bits: The Winnebago Indians, The Trickster Myth Cycle

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Jack's Naughty Bits



It’s
not every day that you encounter a protagonist with a 100-foot-long penis that he keeps
rolled up in a box, but that’s what I found when I read the The Trickster Myth
Cycle
of the Winnebago Indians (collected in Paul Rabin’s The Trickster: A Study
in Indian Mythology
). These myths, which a Nerve reader recommended to me some
months back, recount the misadventures of goofy, mischievous Trickster, a larger than life
hero who many sociologists have argued is an archetypal figure in many of the worlds
myths.


    

In the Trickster tales of the Winnebago Indians (of Wisconsin and Nebraska),
Trickster is a naughty fellow with a particular affinity for his anus and penis. From among
the many highlights of the variegated story, I picked two sections dealing with Trickster’s
longest of schlongs and the comical uses he puts it to. I bet you never saw a magician with
such a magic wand!




* * *







From The Trickster Myth Cycle of the Winnebago Indians






On Trickster proceeded. As he walked along, he came to a lovely piece of land. There he
sat down and soon fell asleep. After a while he woke up and found himself lying on his
back without a blanket . . . His penis had become stiff and the blanket had been forced up.
“That is always happening to me,” he said. “My younger brother, you will lose the blanket,
so bring it back.” Thus he spoke to his penis. Then he took hold of it and, as he handled it,
it got softer and the blanket finally fell down. Then he coiled up his penis and put it in a
box. And only when he came to the end of his penis did he find his blanket. The box with
the penis he carried on his back.


    

After that he walked down a slope and finally came to a lake. On the opposite side
he saw a number of women swimming, the chief’s daughter and her friends. “Now,”
exclaimed Trickster, “is the opportune time: now I am going to have intercourse.”
Thereupon he took his penis out of the box and addressed it, “My younger brother, you are
going after the chief’s daughter. Pass her friends, but see that you lodge squarely in her,
the chief’s daughter.” Thus speaking he dispatched it. It went sliding on the surface of the
water. “Younger brother, come back, come back! You will scare them away if you
approach in that manner!” So he pulled his penis back, took tied a stone around its neck,
and sent it out again. This time it dropped to the bottom of the lake. Again he pulled it back,
took another stone, smaller in size, and attached it to its neck. Soon he sent it forth again. It
slid along the water, creating waves as it passed along. “Brother, come back, come back!
You will drive the women away if you create waves like that.” So he tried a fourth time.
This time he got a stone, just the right size and just the right weight, and attached it to its
neck. When he dispatched it, this time it went directly towards the designated place. It
passed and just barely touched the friends of the chief’s daughter. They saw it and cried
out, “Come out of the water, quick!” The chief’s daughter was the last one on the bank and
could not get away, so the penis lodged squarely in her. Her friends came back and tried to
pull it out, but to no avail. They could do absolutely nothing. Then the men who had the
reputation for being strong were called and tried it but they, too, could not move it. Finally
they all gave up. Then one of them said, “There is an old woman around here who knows
many things. Let us go and see her.” So they went and got her and brought her to the place
where this was happening. When she came there she recognized immediately what was
taking place. “Why, this is First-born, Trickster. The chief’s daughter is having
intercourse and you are all annoying her.” Thereupon she went out, got an awl, and
straddling the penis, worked the awl into it a number of times, singing as she did so,
“First-born, if it is you, pull it out! Pull it out!”


    

Thus she sang. Suddenly in the midst of her singing, the penis was jerked out and
the old woman was thrown a great distance. As she stood there bewildered, Trickster, from
across the lake laughed loudly at her. “That old naughty woman! Why is she doing this
when I am trying to have intercourse? Now she has spoiled all the pleasure.”