My First Time - Nerve.com

Female • 16 years old • Iowa

I was an avid bike rider at the time. My mom and I were on RAGBRAI, which is a bike ride across the state of Iowa. You ride about sixty miles a day and camp at night with 20,000 other bicyclists — basically a huge party on wheels.

My mom had to leave the ride with a couple days left on the schedule. So she left me with some older teenage boys that she knew and trusted. I had my own tent and my own prerogative. The first night, I was good — I just had some beers. The next day I started to think: well, I'm going into my sophomore year in high school. When are things supposed to happen?

Illustration by Thomas Pitilli

I decided I'd better get it over with. I'd been riding with a boy my age. He didn't go to my school, and he was cute. So that night we got a couple beers and went for a walk. We walked away from the big campsite and towards a high school. No one was around, so we lay down in the empty football field, with the stands all around us. He said he had a condom. (You know the one that leaves the indelible mark in your wallet because you've had it for so long?) I was nervous but sure. So, he stumbled about putting it on and thrust into me, maybe... twice? Done.

We walked back and I went to my tent. One of the older boys asked where I'd been. I said nowhere. The next morning, other than a blood stain in my undies, nothing was special. I never saw the other boy again.

Send us your first time story! Email firsttime@nerve.com with 300-800 words about the first time you had sex. (Don't worry, we won't print your name — but please do make sure to include your gender, where you were, and how old you were.) Submissions may be edited, especially if you go all Wonder Years on us. Thanks!

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19 Comments

God this was horrible.

JT commented on 06/30

At least it sounds real. For most people, I think the first time doesn't turn out to be as "special" as it's supposed to be, because you're usually teenagers with limited income and freedom and planning abilities. So I don't think this series is so great. I think a better one would be "my best time" versus "my worst time", where the same person writes about both experiences. That might be interesting.

JCF commented on 06/30

I thought the brevity and matter-of-fact tone was refreshing. It was nice that it wasn't trying so hard to be some nihilist Pulahniuk-type piece, like so much modern writing seems to be these days.

NDO commented on 06/30

Yeah, sucks that it wasn't as great as it could have been. I'd bet that most people have an experience more like this one.

IC commented on 06/30

Not that I expect anyone will care, but I hate this feature. Just throwing my voice out into the interwebs.

blm commented on 06/30

Yeah. This feature is totally unnecessary and kind of creepily invasive.

GH commented on 06/30

how can NERVE which used to be so great, have fallen so far? what dreadful piece of writing. Is there no editor left who can pick up a pencil (figuratively, of course)?

ag commented on 06/30

I agree with the above - this is a lame feature, why do I want to read about people's lame first time experiences? Nerve is not what it used to be ....

PI commented on 06/30

I dislike this series too. It's not compelling in the way nerve confessions is, because it isn't impulsive and raw the way nerve confessions are. But it also isn't written by actual "writers" - you know, those people who are skilled at transforming experience into story? The vignettes in this series are competently structured accounts, not great writing. Nerve can do better.

ja commented on 06/30

I don't know, but I kind of like this series. I like that the writing is unprofessional and that the stories are a little unspectacular, simply because it's relatable. It's like hearing a conversation between friends about their first times or something. There's honesty and intimacy in the normalness, and it kind of breaks that notion that your first time has to be something really story-worthy.

KE commented on 06/30

I'm actually glad I read this, it is one of a kind.

EM commented on 06/30

I like the best v. worst times idea, JCF, it would probably bring out more interesting stories. I like the poignancy and simplicity of these first-times, but they're nothing spectacular, and I'm guessing it'll get old fast. I'm talking to YOU, nerve--we want our socks (and potentially, various other garments) knocked off!

AR commented on 07/01

Nerve used to be good. I've been coming back semi regularly hoping they'll lift their game, but no - just more and more crap like this. Epic fail guys. I'm over you.

DF commented on 07/01

HOT HOT HOT!! A girl up for anything!

vtm commented on 07/02

She should've had and older guy, say over 40, and it would have lasted longer, and she'd have a great experience. To young- To short

wwa commented on 07/05

Ew. Baby boomers need to fuck right off.

BLS commented on 07/09

that sucks. i enjoy these post, great way to start the day.

eq commented on 07/09

Hahaha, "creepily invasive"? To people who send these in of their own accord? Now I've heard everything.

DS commented on 10/22

I also am enjoying these. They aren't exactly feel-good reads, no. But haven't you even seen a photo of some old and leathery man or woman who may not have been particularly attractive while still young only to be the subject of a beautiful photo? That's kind of how I see these. They're almost poignant in their banality. It's not about the sex. It's about the writers' emotions and attitudes and how they've changed over time since what is generally considered a sort of milestone occurred.

JB commented on 11/11

Previous First Times

Female • 17 years old • Mobile, AL
"In southern Alabama, schools teach abstinence..."
Female • 19 years old • Salt Lake City, UT
"I was in my confused am-I-a-lesbian phase..."
Female • 16 years old • Austin, TX
"I didn't have any friends — just one acquaintance from orientation..."
Male • 22 years old • North Carolina
"My wife and I were both virgins when we got engaged at age twenty-two..."
Male • 18 years old • Suburbs of Philadelphia
"I was the only person who'd ever befriend her before trying to get her into bed..."
Female • 17 years old • Canada
"It wasn't planned out — nothing was planned out that summer..."
Female • 21 years old • Syracuse
"At age twenty-one, I set my sights on a six-foot-five-inch ogre..."
Female • 17 years old • Covina
"In the dark, I listened to his heartbeat..."
Male • 16 years old • Houston
"The first time we went out ended in handcuffs..."
Female • 21 years old • Vienna
"I remember the zip of the door, and our naked dash across the dark campground to his tent..."
Female • 20 years old • Philadelphia
"We wandered around West Philly in the rain, looking for a good place..."
Female • 19 years old • Riverside
"My statement was met with some applause and a toast, and the mission was on..."
Female • 15 years old • Ireland
"I was surprisingly adventurous, and he was surprisingly shy..."
Female • 18 years old • Wongaling Beach, Australia
"I was just discovering this power I had..."
Female • 15 years old • Vancouver, Canada
"Being a small-town fat girl with mental problems didn't leave me with tremendouslsy high self-esteem..."
Female • 16 years old • New York
"I looked down, and abruptly stopped laughing..."
Female • 16 years old • Pittsburgh
"I showcased my lust in my journal; every detail was documented..."
Female • 17 years old • Canada
"For the first week of camp, he came up to me every night at the end of our shift..."
Female • 17 years old • Tacoma, Washington
"I think about him even thirty years later..."
Female • 17 years old • Virginia
"He was the lead singer in a band about to make it any moment..."
Female • 16 years old • Connecticut
"I'm twenty-two now, and I'm only just starting to accept what happened..."
Female • 20 years old • Europe
"He came to open the door wearing a sarong, eyes heavy with eyeliner..."
Female • 21 years old • South Florida
"I had absolutely no intention of leaving college a virgin..."
Male • 16 years old • North Wales
"I attempted to sound casual and instead emitted something of a squeak..."
Male • 16 years old • South of France
"Come on then, are we going to shag or what?"
Female • 16 years old • Iowa
"He didn't go to my school, and he was cute..."
Male • 17 years old • Massachusetts
"Where this 'expertise' came from, considering I'd never kissed a girl, I don't really know..."
Male • 23 years old • Tohoku, Japan
"The next day, she called me three times and I was too sketched out to pick up..."
Female • 17 years old • Pennsylvania
"I zeroed my sights on a bassist..."
Male • 17 years old • Illinois
"My virginity was auctioned off..."