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A common criticism leveled at the
U.S. is that we're not the most worldly society: less than ten percent of the population owns a passport and thirty-five percent are unable to name the country south of Texas.* So how can we become more involved in the utopian ideal that is the global village? By learning to describe sexual
acts in foreign tongues, of course! In the first installment
of this culturally enlightening series, we visit those masters of insults and double-entendre, the French. Grant Stoddard
* It's Mexico
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| English |
French |
What
it means |
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| "I don't give a shit!" |
Je m'en bats les couilles |
"I slap my balls against it!" |
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| To give a blowjob |
Tailler une pipe |
carving a pipe |
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| cunnilingus |
brouter le cresson |
grazing watercress |
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| menstruation |
les Anglais ont débarqué |
the English have landed |
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| uncircumcised |
chauve à col roulé |
bald one in a turtleneck |
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| titty fuck |
branlette Espagnol |
Spanish jerkoff |
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| "You are hot!" |
Tu es pine-au-cul mettable |
"You are ass-fuckable!" |
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| dildo |
gode |
God |
Next time: the infinitely practical guide to Dutch. |
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