Washington, D.C. is a swamp. If you had any doubt,
look to the sudden fame of giddily whorish 24-year-old Jessica
Cutler. Bringing new meaning to the term "entry level," for
months she's been supplmenting her $25K "Staff Ass" (local
slang for assistant) salary at Republican
Senator Mike DeWine's office with some champion gold-digging,
detailed over the past two weeks in her alternately preening and
petulant blog, Washingtonienne.
(Warning: do not be fooled by the fake
Washingtonienne that went up recently amid this week's Cutlermania).
Recounting sexual escapades with a variety of men, including a "Chief of Staff appointed by Bush," the original blog became a
must-read for those curious about the seamy, hypersexed underbelly
of the Republican-controlled region below the Beltway. Sadly, Cutler
was only able to document ten days worth of slutdom before being
fired by DeWine on Friday for "unacceptable use of Senate
computers to post unsuitable and offensive material to an Internet
Web log." Naturally, Cutler is now milking her sudden fame
as the second coming of Deep Throat (only she's frustratingly
unwilling to name names). — Ada
Calhoun
So what are you up to now?
I just did an interview with The Post. The New York
Post.
Are you enjoying all this?
Enjoying? I'm trying to make the most of it. Obviously, I was enjoying my life
before I was outed [in a coup by Wonkette]
or whatever, but now, you know, it's out of my control, I have to just try
to enjoy what parts of it I can.
We're really curious about what's going on in D.C. sex-wise.
Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Is it common for pretty young girls like you to get money from
older men?
I think so — money, or gifts, whatever, that's pretty common in New York
as well. I don't feel that I'm extraordinarily good-looking and I never asked
for any of the stuff that was offered, so I'm going to have to say that it
is common because I'm not exceptional, you know what I mean?
Yeah. So what kind of habits did you notice among men on the
Hill?
Oh. I think that you know, during the day you have to be very professional
and conservative but at night people like to have fun. [laughs]
So are they maybe more crazy at night, because they're so buttoned-up
during the day?
I've been in Washington a year and that blog was only written in the past ten
days. But I'd say, in general, yes. Obviously, you see that in New York too,
but I have to say that guys in New York weren't as bad. [laughs] Um, I've asked
people, 'What's the interest in this story, why is it a big deal?' And they're
like, 'Washington is such a conservative town,' and I have to be like, 'Well,
from my blog and from my own stance here, it is not very conservative!' [laughs]
So, what about liberals versus conservatives —who's better?
[laughs] Oh, I don't know. I'm bipartisan [laughs]. You know, people on the
Hill in general are a certain way. It's conservative all around. But at night,
I think, they're not much different in bed!
Oh, yeah?
No!
The great leveler?
Yeah. [laughs]
I think there would be an expectation that conservatives would
be kinkier...
Hmmm...
You know, because they're more repressed?
No, that's not necessarily true. [laughs] Let's not generalize. [laughs]
Fair enough. So can you tell me what D.C. people talk about
in bed? Do they discuss politics?
In bed, no, we never talked about that, none of the guys. Not blog guys, not
non-blog guys, never talked about that. They did talk about things like wanting
to do it in the office, or on, you know, the Senator's desk, but I'm not referring
to anyone in particular. That's happened to me quite a few times, that they
mentioned that, and I thought it was absolutely crazy.
Did you ever do it?
Never, never done it. No. [laughs] But it's something I've noticed amongst
men on the Hill, they like to talk about that for some reason.
That's interesting. So, the Chief of Staff guy, he said that?
He doesn't work on the Hill, I mean, he works, you know, in government... Actually,
he's a very decent guy. I mean, we had just, like, straight sex.
Yeah?
Yeah.
So he wasn't into anything particularly kinky?
No! Not at all. You know, we really liked each other. It wasn't, you know,
a john-hooker relationship. I'd been seeing him for a long time — well,
since I'd been here, you know, for several months.
Are you still seeing him?
I'm not seeing any of those guys. I think it's best not to. I feel sorry for
what happened, but, you know, a lot of them are in positions where they should
know better. I should have known better! [laughs]. In retrospect, it's like,
what the hell were we doing?
You think it was sloppy?
Um, sloppy? You know, I pretty much managed to, you know, manage my time well
[laughs]. I mean, I had safe sex and everything. It wasn't. . . there was
nothing. . .yeah, maybe I was taking on more than I could handle [laughs].
But it's interesting, isn't it, how sex can make you feel powerful?
Powerful? Um...
To use sex in this way.
Well, now I feel like, you know, they're probably really worried I'm going
to say something. But at the same time, that's not the kind of person I am,
you know? I really liked all these guys. I would never have sex with someone
I wasn't attracted to or whom I didn't like.
Right.
So, I was probably just greedy [laughs].
I don't even mean power, like, you can blackmail them, but
power just like it's exciting having sex with all these powerful
men.
Isn't everybody like that? I don't know, I didn't really feel powerful. I felt
like I was just trying to have a good time. You know, I never really thought
of it that way. I mean, it is flattering when you have guys trying to go out
with you all the time, but I think anyone would feel that way. So, yeah, I
wouldn't describe it as 'I felt powerful.'
As far as this Chief of Staff guy, can you tell us who he is?
Um, no, I'm not going to tell anyone about him. He has a family... I have to
give that answer because it makes me sound good.
How did money come up? I mean, you met him and you liked him...
Well, he asked what I did, and I think at the time I was actually working at
a non-profit, and everyone knows people my age — I mean, I didn't go
to law school or anything — are probably not making a lot of money.
And he would ask, 'What's going on in your life?' And I was usually like,
'Oh, I have to pay this and do this.' Of course, for someone my age, money
is an issue. So he was trying to do a nice thing. He was generous. He was
very nice.
So he offered you money before sex even came up?
Um, how did that. . .? I'm trying to remember how the hell it even came up!
Well, yeah, he was saying, like, 'I can't take you out, I'm married, we can't
be seen anywhere, I can't take you to dinner, there's no future here, just
so you know. But we like each other, and I want to help you.' You know, you
like each other, you care about each other, that's what that was about, so
he knew I could use it, and I never turned it down.
And where did you meet?
Somebody introduced us. It wasn't like a pimp or anything. Someone that we
both knew.
Uh-huh. So, is there anything that you left off the blog, besides
your partners' names, because you were afraid it was going to
get somebody in trouble?
Well, it was written for my friends. Really, it was for a small group of friends.
And it was really to save me time,. They would email me all morning, like,
'What happened with so-and-so?' I think in a way they were living vicariously
through me. But it would take me all morning to get through this stuff. So
I actually asked them, 'Shouldn't I just have a blog?' And they were like,
'If anyone should have a blog, it's you!' So I started keeping one and I figured
there's millions of blogs, mine's never going to be picked up by the radar.
You know, it's just about me, and I'm not that important, and big deal! I didn't
think anyone would care. And then...
Yeah.
It was really for my friends. Like, there's all this background info, and it's
written in a tone, so, like, some of the things I say, they know what I mean,
but people who don't know me don't really get it. Most of it, I mean, everything
in there is true, because there's no reason to lie to your best friends.
But like, on the other hand, it's written in a very mocking tone, so it's
hard for people who don't know me to understand. It's probably hard for the
men whom it's about to understand why I would talk about them in that way.
Like I said, it's just written for friends. And it's just kind of shocking,
that now I'm like, 'Oh my God, I have to second guess everything I wrote!'
[laughs]
Yeah, sure. But one thing you're saying is, 'Oh, it's not a
big deal, who are we?' But if one of these guys you're talking
about is someone Bush appointed, prominent and probably conservative,
that someone's going to look like a hypocrite if he's paying
for sex with young women.
Yeah...I don't really know the particulars about his job. Really, is he a hypocrite?
I don't know. I mean, for me, my job was a job. I worked for a Republican who
was against abortion, and probably gay marriage. I don't feel that way about
those things. To me, a job is a job, you know? So now I'm reading things about
me,
like I'm against gay marriage, and I'm like, 'No, I'm not! Actually, I'm for
it!' Or whatever. I'm very pro-choice, you know, I've had an abortion, it's
not a thing. I was working on the Hill because it's fun. It was fun, anyway.
So the Chief of Staff wasn't, like, a Christian Coalition member
or something?
I would not know, but I don't believe so. He never told me if he was.
But he must have been a Republican if he was appointed by Bush?
Probably. I mean, you would hope.
So you're planning to move to New York?
Yeah. This weekend, I'm supposed to go out with people and stuff. There's a
lot of people who want to meet me.
Well, you're very exciting!
Oh, God, whatever. Really. I mean, in New York there are so many just like
me. There's some just like me on the Hill, only they didn't keep a blog.
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"Just having a man that cares for you is reason to be grateful. If that doesn’t put you 'in the mood,' he married the wrong woman." — Dr. Laura
