Jude Law has been caught cheating on his twenty-three-year-old fiancée Sienna Miller with his children's nanny. Thank God at least one leading man is doing what he's supposed to: screwing everything that moves. Plus, as someone in our office mentioned, "nannies as a category have gotten a good resexualizing PR bump." And don't you know that Sadie Frost, who's had to watch the father of her three young children feign monogamy with Sienna lo these many months, feels fantastic? In one fell swoop, Jude has raised his perceived potency, glamorrized nannydom and pleased his ex-wife. And for that, he is our crush of the week. — Ada Calhoun

"It's like, 'Who cares?' . . . I play it as it lays. Okay, so I may not be the greatest lover in the world. Well, let's make that angle work. There's lots of different paths to the waterfall. You don't have to be Don Juan. And wasn't it Gloria Steinem who said that women have to be responsible for their own orgasms? Well, I take her at her word. I'll do my best, okay, but at a certain point you've got to, like, you know . . ." — Owen Wilson's response to Rolling Stone's inquiry about the rumor he took a girl back to his hotel and licked her butt for two hours.

Pete Rose, underwear model.

Video-gamers are all worked up over the secret sex scene in Grand Theft Auto. Watch it here. Unless you're fresh out of prison and live in Florida, where even reading Maxim is a parole violation.

"Ada, You, and by extension your columns, are incredibly sexy. How do you do it?!" We always Google people who send us rhetorical fan letters. The first hit this one yielded: "FreeBSD-Security: Passwords in Jails." It's always good to have fans in the prison system.

Turn your labia into a fridge magnet with "Match Your Snatch."

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Plague: Beasts of the Sea At Jessica Simpson's birthday party, "partygoers lounged by the pool, which was filled with mechanical fish."