March 24, 2000
More Naughty Naughton
So much for the fantasy defense.
Patrick Naughton, the thirty-four-year-old former Infoseek executive who
was arrested last
September for crossing state lines to have sex with a minor, entered a
surprising guilty plea last week. Naughton, you’ll remember, traveled from his Seattle home to “lick and suck” KrisLA, a “thirteen-year-old girl” he met online who turned
out to be an undercover fed. But in his December trial, the onetime Silicon
Valley Wunderkind he was one of the architects of the Java
programming language in the late ’80s and early ’90s beat back the
charges by arguing that he didn’t really believe KrisLA was a little
girl, and that it was all part of the role-playing magic of the Internet
(which begs the question, Who did he think he was meeting?).
But prosecutors appealed the decision, and Naughton apparently didn’t want
to push his luck with that defense. He now faces as many as fifteen years
in prison (though he’ll probably spend no more than eighteen months behind
bars) and will have to register as a sex offender.
According to the San Jose Mercury News, after entering his plea,
Naughton shared a few words and a laugh with Bruce Applin,
the FBI agent who posed as KrisLA. Ah, that flame never really goes
out, does it?
Hey Look! Norwegian Wood!
There’s a stripper in Lemvig, Norway, who might do much better with the fantasy defense. That’s because Brian Sandholm, a twenty-three-year-old local, says he was
harassed by said stripper at a local disco last week. Story goes like this:
Sandholm, who had been frequenting the disco to watch the strip show,
unexpectedly found himself the featured attraction when one of the girls
brought him onstage, handcuffed him to a chair and yanked off his pants. But according to CNN, Sandholm must not have been as thrilled as everyone else was, because he called the
cops. Sandholm claimed the woman stripped him of his pride, and demanded
that she be arrested. Police questioned the unnamed stripper, but didn’t
take her into custody. Which means that she could strike again at any moment.
Police in Westminster, Colorado, arrested five people last week for their roles in a cruel and unusual scam: they lured men into paying for sex, then sprayed them with Mace instead.
According to the Rocky Mountain News, the scam went like this: Customers who called the number in the Ten Plus Entertainment ad that promised a “hot and sexy” striptease were told they’d be met by a stripper. When the meetings occurred, the woman would suggest that, for the right tip, she’d be willing to do more than strip. But after the john had forked over the dough, the woman would leave the room; if the man tried to stop her, a bodyguard would charge in and Mace him, then leave with the girl.
And from the depths of such rejection come all the great country and western lyrics.
Quotes of the Week
“Life is short, so why not get carried away? Like the other night, for
example, this guy gave me head. I’m not gay. I don’t think so, anyway. I
don’t know. I just wanted to see what it felt like. And you know, he stunk.
I thought, ‘It’s gonna be good because he’s a guy.’ But he went at it like
he was eating corn on the cob or something.”