This Week in Sex

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This Week in Sex   
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March 30, 2001

Trendwatch, 2K1

Heard about that guy down in Texas? The one who posted about four dozen deranged voice mails from his apparently psycho ex-girlfriend? We’re quite confident you did because, well, everyone heard about it, but in case you didn’t, go now. It’s at, appropriately enough, and thanks to one poor, disturbed girl — and a mischevious Texan with a little tech savvy and no sense of decorum — the office cubes of America were buzzing this week with more than the usual amount of psychosis. Anyway, we bring it up because that pretty much makes it official: acrimonious break-ups are the new black.


Because there’s more. You already know about Meg and Dennis and Russell, and that’s been pretty darn acrimonious. And then there’s the guy in the Netherlands — we don’t know his name because the report didn’t say — who’s put together a little business for himself posting nude and obscene photographs of women sent in by their angry ex-boyfriends. According to the report, the man already owned a small Web company, and when his employee showed up one day furious over a spat with his former partner, the company owner did what any good boss would do: he helped his colleague post every pornographic picture he had ever taken of the girl. Now, authorities are preparing to investigate the suddenly popular subscription-only site — Ananova didn’t give us the name of that, either — over possible privacy violations, but the owner figures to make a healthy profit before there’s any risk of being shut down. “It’s fun,” he says. “People can discover how the wife’s butcher or the mayor’s daughter really are.” Sigh. Wacky Europeans. That kind of thing would never happen here.

Just Do It

Sex is not an Olympic sport.


We say that for purposes of clarification. Dancing is an Olympic sport, and so are ping pong and walking, so you might think sex would be in there somehow. Good sex, at least. Wrong.


There. Now that we all know that, we’re even with the folks over at Moulin Rouge, a swingers’ club in Montecchio, Italy, just outside Verona. Because they, too, assumed that the mattress mambo — just another kind of dance, after all — was an event to be spectated by a stadium full of people, so they applied for (and got) a grant from the Italian government, an Olympic funding grant. Said they were a sports and recreation club, and really, they didn’t lie, did they? Unfortunately for the club, officials from the Government and Italian Olympic Committee did eventually get around to visiting the club — routine inspection, you know, see how our boys are doing — and while they surely found all sorts of exotic new toys and perhaps a hot tub built for thirty, they didn’t find anyone lifting weights, or jogging, or whatever it is walkers do to get in competitive shape. Because while the Moulin Rouge specializes in wife-swapping, well, juggling is not an Olympic sport either.

And Speaking of Sex and Sports . . .

College athletics have developed something of a tawdry reputation in recent years, with athletes and coaches making headlines every day for lying, cheating and stealing, and often all three in the same incident. But every now and then, a story comes along that warms your heart, a story that reminds you that these are, after all, just kids. Most of ’em will never go pro, never go on to big-time careers of drugs and sexual assault and tax fraud — really, that’s just the elite few. More often than not, these are college kids, just trying to get an education and maybe have a little fun along the way. Leilani Rios’ story is one such story.


Rios, a sophomore cross-country runner for Cal State Fullerton in Orange County, California, has reportedly left her team over a dispute with her coach. Apparently, collegiate long-distance running doesn’t pay nearly as well as, say, college basketball, so Rios, a sophomore majoring in kinesiology, had taken a side job stripping at the nearby Flamingo Theater. When Coach John Elders found out (the weasels on the baseball team ratted Rios out), he gave her a choice: quit stripping, or quit the team. The decision was easy, Rios said — running was just exercise, but stripping “was paying for my school, which is more important than sports.” But don’t weep for Rios just yet: Matt Simpson, who coaches cross-country at nearby Golden West College, suggested that Rios think about transferring to his squad. “I hate to see a girl give up on running,” Simpson said. He’s all heart, ain’t he?

Quote of the Week

“This is getting ridiculous. Where is a man supposed to unwind and buy porn movies in this town?”

— An unidentified thirty-six-year-old man, quoted in the New York Post about Mayor Rudy Giuliani’s crackdown on the city’s adult businesses.

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©2001 Dan Reines and, Inc.