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| Deep Sadness |
Tributes are still pouring in after the death of an experienced woman who brought a glimmer of hope to millions of loyal fans in their darkest hour. No, we're not talking about the Queen Mum. Linda Lovelace, the porn performer who made X-rated history in 1972 by starring in Deep Throat, died Tuesday of injuries sustained from a car accident earlier this month. She was fifty-three years old. Lovelace (real name: Linda Boreman) gulped her way to stardom as a woman who could only achieve orgasm by giving oral sex a condition that affects one in every ten trillion women.* Since her move to Colorado in 1990, Boreman had become an outspoken critic of the porn industry, claiming she was forced into the business by her first husband and had been paid nothing for her performance in Deep Throat, a film that grossed more than $600 million. Brings a lump to the throat, doesn't it?
*an educated guess from Em and Lo
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| Bum Rap |
Pretty-boy rapper Eminem has reportedly paid £100,000 (about $170,000) to ensure that his gay-bashing, uber-hetero persona remains intact. The latest cover of UK culture magazine The Face features Eminem wearing a T-shirt that was digitally changed from red to pink by the magazine's designers, so it wouldn't clash with the rest of the cover. Em was so upset by the change that he bought every copy of the May edition and had them destroyed before they hit newsstands. A reprinted version will be printed with a tougher-looking Slim on the cover. Talk about cutting off your nose to spite your face. You'd think that a picture of Slim Shady making like a circus seal with the Backstreet Boys had surfaced. I mean
would the real Slim Shady please come
out? The rapper reportedly threatened never to enter the UK again if the copies weren't destroyed. Although Tony Blair was unavailable for comment, royal toker and Slim Shady fan Prince Harry was quoted as saying that Eminem's reaction was a "mad diss, yo."
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| Great Dane |
The Brits aren't known for making a fuss. Outside of sporting events and the House of Commons, they generally keep shouting, whooping and all other outward display of emotion to an absolute minimum. But every once in a while, an unassimilated non-subject will unwittingly highlight the stark contrast between the UK and the continent. British police, responding to reports of screams coming from an apartment, discovered a couple in the middle of a post-pub shag. Jamie Cheshire answered the door wearing a towel and told police he had been having sex with his twenty-one-year-old Danish girlfriend, Lenny Devaney. The vociferous Scandinavian told reporters, "I've never had any problem with police before, but flatmates have complained about me being noisy." Throughout the incident, Mr. Cheshire maintained a stiff upper lip.
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| Beat the Clock |
What's all this talk of generation gaps? It's a common misconception that when one reaches retirement age, all thoughts of getting one's freak on are eclipsed by more benign pastimes: strolls in the park, crossword puzzles and countless hours glued to Matlock. But if you can get past the wrinkles, relentless complaining and musty aroma, you'll realize that senior citizens are looking for action as much as we are even if they have to pay for it. Last Tuesday, randy senior William R. Johnson drove a new acquaintance into the Florida woods for sex at about six p.m. An hour later, he was found stumbling out of the woods and onto busy U.S. Highway 41, sporting a fresh goose egg on his wizened noggin. Apparently, Johnson had been unable to complete the act in the allotted time and told his antsy party girl that he wouldn't pay until he was good and ready. The woman promptly hit him over the head with a blunt object, stole his wallet and took off in the seventy-nine-year-old's pink-and-white van. Florida authorities are concerned that copycat assaults on shuffling oldsters could take place in express checkout lines throughout the state.
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Commentarium (9 Comments)
I never saw Deep Throat 30 years ago as I couldnt appreciate her looks from the ads. Marilyn Chambers in Behind the Green Door was my favorite. Then to believe that Lovelace was forced to perform defies belief. By the mid 70s some suburban theaters featured hard core porn, and there were some classics--Misty Beethoven, et al. One girlfriend went with me and we could hardly wait to get home, strip, shower, make out and then head for the bed after seeing some of the classic 70s pornos. We would try some of the positions and she often learned how to please me orally after seeing some young babe ravish her man. My girlfriend now enjoys some porn, esp by women directors besides the Better Sex videos that are hot! The women I know want a story line, a sexy man, romantic dialogue and lots of foreplay(playful spanking and earlobe probing, even some toe sucking) before the main event on a big bed.
Great this week in sex, I love the new key. However, why not make the mouseovers on the pictures explain what the pictures mean, instead of who they are pictures of? I mean, everyone knows what Ricky Martin looks like, but they may not know what you're trying to say by it...
I kinda like the old format better.....where are the story links? The stories seem tamer....and what happened to the quotes of the week?
To TA, are you thinking about breaking news?
http://www.nerve.com/news/
This Week In Sex has never had links to stories.
I love this new format.
I am disappointed by your treatment of Linda Lovelace's death. Your column noting her recent death mentioned her public campaign against the porn industry but belittled her attempt to speak candidly about her experiences and mocked her contention that the industry is filled with violence, coercion and sadism. I know that there are women (and men) out there who would argue that the sex industry provides an arena for women to leverage power over men, but judging from the federal testimony Lovelace gave during the pornography hearings in Washington a few years ago, this was definitely not her experience. Forgive my expression, but it takes balls for a woman of her notoriety to speak freely and openly against a powerful and popular entity for the benefit of other battered women in and out of the industry. It would have been thoughtful and enlightened for Nerve to link the obituary to some of her testimony so that readers can judge for themselves, instead of slagging her off one last time.
KMA- Who said it would be the last time?
Grant..... Stoddard!!! You da man, G. Don't listen to the naysayers, they are just hatin'. Well done, as always.
Whatever one thinks of Linda Lovelace's story, her claims (probably true) of physical abuse and (certainly true) of financial exploitation, glibness is rarely if ever the way to mark someone's death.
This is really awful. Even People Magazine would have taken a more serious tone. I guess Grant Stoddard couldn't resist fucking Linda Lovelace, even though she's dead. Sick.
Now you say something