This Week in Sex

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This Week in Sex   
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April 28, 2000

Restoration Hardware

Ron Miller isn’t thrilled that his parents had him circumcised when he was
an infant — actually, his exact words in the Pittsburgh
were, “I’m pissed off about the forty years of wasted sex
I’ve had.” But instead of sitting around griping about all the erotic
sensation he says he’s been robbed of, Miller did something about it.


As the fifty-eight-year-old engineer explained this week to the gathered
masses (four people) at the first meeting of the Pittsburgh branch of the
National Organization for Restoring Men, or NORM, he has regrown a
foreskin using surgical tape, paper, and a suspender belt. No, really.
Here’s how it worked: Miller used the tape and paper to make a sleeve which
covered the end of his penis, and which he taped to the shaft of his penis.
He then clipped one end of the suspender belt to the edge of the sleeve
(careful, Ron), wrapped the belt around his waist, and clipped the other
end to his underwear. The result was enough tension to the shaft skin to
stretch it and promote new skin growth. After about two years of “tugging,”
as the practice is called, Miller says he’s got his foreskin — and his
sexual pleasure — back. “If you can imagine looking at an old black
and white TV versus watching HDTV, that’s the difference,” he said. Local
urologists quoted in the article are skeptical.

Playboys Will Be Boys

In its forty-plus years, Playboy has been willing to cross some feminist lines, but one thing founder Hugh Hefner has always been adamant about is that the magazine not depict violence toward women, either in words or pictures. So when the Romanian edition of Playboy ran an article in its April issue entitled “How to Beat Your Wife Without Leaving Marks on Her Body,” it raised more than a few red flags in Bucharest — and within Playboy Enterprises, where
Chairman and CEO Christie (“Hef’s little girl”) Hefner reportedly went ballistic. According to a Reuters report, Hefner dispatched Playboy‘s international editorial director to Bucharest to reprimand the Romanian edition’s editorial staff. Romanian deputy editor-in-chief Mihail Galatanu shrugged the story off as an April Fool’s joke, adding that the methods described in the piece “cannot work” anyway. Oh. Well then, what’s the problem?

The Sixteenth Minute

Speaking of Playboy (and unhappy marriages and alleged domestic
violence), Darva Conger is in the news again. Conger, the
thirty-four-year-old blonde nurse who agreed to an ill-fated televised
wedding to rich guy-slash-“comedian” Rick Rockwell back in February, has
apparently embraced the inevitable by agreeing to pose nude for the
magazine. Conger, who has insisted that her disastrous appearance on Who Wants to Marry a
ruined her life, will reportedly receive a six-figure
payday for her photo shoot, though a Playboy spokesperson would not
confirm the report. For his part, Rockwell told ABC News that while he
plans to leaf through the issue when it hits the newsstands this fall (it’d
be his first chance to see his ex-wife naked), he won’t buy the magazine: “I won’t give her an extra nickel.”

Quotes of the Week

“Pay particular attention to the places you enter. Lots of tourists are
taken by surprise when the lady they are visiting turns out to be a

— From the Police Red Light Guide, a leaflet published by
Amsterdam police to help foreign tourists safely enjoy the city’s famed
sex-and-drugs district.

“There are two types of people who oppose pornography — people who don’t
know what they’re talking about and those who don’t know what they’re

Hustler publisher Larry Flynt, during a Beverly Hills
debate on pornography with rabbi and Kosher Sex author Shmuley Boteach.

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©2000 Dan Reines and Nerve Publishing