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This Week in Sex: 11.19.99

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This Week in Sex   
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November 19, 1999




Viagra, Now Kosher



Miami Beach, rejoice! Rabbi Abraham Blumenkrantz of Far Rockaway, Queens, this week announced that Orthodox Judaism gives a hearty thumbs-up to the anti-impotency drug. That endorsement wasn’t a foregone conclusion, given that the drug contains an ingredient made from animal derivatives — which would normally make it unkosher for consumption by devout Jews. But as Blumenkrantz says, a healthy marriage (and yes, this only counts for married couples) takes precedence over the laws of kashrut; thus, the little blue pill with the big results is, in fact, kosher. “To keep a good marital relationship plays a very important role in Jewish law,” Blumenkrantz said. “A couple married properly under Jewish law and experiencing an intimate dysfunction may use Viagra.” Mazel tov!




Petri Dick



The Impotence World Association announced last week that it may be possible within 25 years to artificially grow penises and vaginas in a lab and surgically implant them in (on?) people to produce fully functional sexual organs. The sex organs would be cultured from human cells and grown over an appropriately shaped lattice or mold; in the process of these cells growing, the various layers of the vagina and penis would develop. “As unbelievable as this may be,” said Dr. Myron Murdock, national director of the impotence group, “the process of tissue engineering, and the ex vivo [outside the body] production of functioning human organs such as the penis and vagina are being done today in the laboratory.”


    

We can’t wait to watch the ethicists grapple with this one.


Tolerance High



At El Modena High in Orange, California, you can join the Computer Club if you’re so moved. Or you can join the Bible Club, or even the Juggling Club. What you can’t do is join the Gay-Straight Alliance Club, because they don’t have one — though that issue is up for debate.


    

A school board meeting about the subject last week drew more than 400 concerned locals. It all started when Anthony Colin, who is 15 years old and gay, told the Associated Press that “there are places at school I can’t walk through. I have to have somebody with me so I won’t get spit on or hit.” He proposed the gay-straight alliance as a haven for gay students and a way of promoting tolerance.


    

But in the heart of ultra-conservative Orange County, it’s not that simple. Opponents of the club quoted from the Bible at the public hearing and argued that school is no place to deal with sex. They even suggested scrapping all extracurricular clubs, rather than allow this one. Seventeen-year-old Shannon McMillan, another openly gay student, said the club’s detractors are missing the point. “We are asking for a support group and they think we are asking for a sex group. People need to stop hearing and start listening, because nobody is really listening to what this club is really about.” The school board has tabled the vote until December 7.




Radio Free What?



Last August, Ryan Lenguyen brought adult film star Mila Shegol from Los Angeles to Flagstaff, Arizona, to help promote the grand opening of his new adult video store on a local radio show. He didn’t want anything too flamboyant, he said, and “[Shegol] was reminded that this is a very small, conservative town, and we all assumed that she understood what that entailed.”


    

Perhaps Lenguyen should have been more specific. The talk on the live remote quickly turned a little blue, then a lot blue, and before anyone could stop her, Shegol — you know her from Nymphos and Fassion Passion, among others — was offering free sexual favors to anyone who stopped by the store.


    

As you might guess, the tactic worked, with hundreds of locals rushing to the store in search of a little somethin’ somethin’. “I’m surprised we didn’t have a lot of car wrecks, given some of the things that were said,” Deputy Police Chief Bob White said. But the ploy also backfired; Lenguyen says the Flagstaff police department is now “breathing down my neck,” and Flagstaff Mayor Chris Bavasi is hard at work revamping the city’s zoning ordinances to ban adult video stores. Oh, and Shegol was charged this week with disorderly conduct and indecent exposure. Let’s hope it doesn’t ruin her career.



Quotes of the Week



“I think the Pill altered female thinking. When you think that millions of women were taking daily hormones, you cannot deny that it must have changed their personalities. I truly don’t think feminism would have reached such absurd proportions if there were no Pill. It must have had an effect.”



— Director/fugitive Roman Polanski, in Esquire





“We would have had five if, well, if we had carried on, I suppose.”



— Prime Minister Tony Blair in an interview last July with the BBC, explaining that he would have liked more children. Yesterday Blair announced a “lovely surprise” — his wife Cherie, 45, is expecting their fourth child.









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©1999 Dan Reines and Nerve Publishing