Recession Dating: You're Doing It Wrong

dating

The New York Times has been running an ongoing blog post with reader dating advice for the recession's latest permutation. Some are obvious (skip Cipriani, stick to the burger place), others rather brilliant (it's easier to turn "dinner and a movie" into a "home cooked meal and DVD" now.)

Here are our favorites... and least favorites... you'll know the difference.

Midrange dates can add up quickly... start off going to a few reasonably nice places... downshift into the moderate zone to give her a sense of what everyday life might be like together. [the Times]

Most guys think it’s appropriate to go Dutch, but [girls disagree]. This isn’t because we’re cheap. It’s because you feel special that someone took you out and thought that it was worth it to [pay]. Later on, anything goes. If I have a better job, then I’d certainly have no problem picking up the tab. Just think about how much more energy girls put into getting ready for dates than guys: the shoes, the dress, the hair, the makeup ... Emma Rabinovich

It really doesn’t matter how much you spend on a woman... it’s always been not what they say but what they mean. And what women really want is instant chemistry. [A]s long as women think they can tell in the first five minutes and don’t take the time to learn who the guy is, the dating sites will flourish. Barry Silverman

[I]n my world, “dinner and a movie” means a nice home-cooked meal followed by a movie on my 8-foot screen. None of my dates has ever complained. A man who cooks well will always have an advantage.
Mauricio Parra

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Related:

This Week in Online Dating

Commentarium (6 Comments)

May 19 09 - 1:54pm
Theresa

Call me a modern woman, but I have no problem with "Dutch Treat". When my fiance and I first started dating, we would alternate paying when we went out, and we had no problem staying in, cooking dinner and then watching a movie. In this economy, it's only right. Our living expenses are split, as well, however, proportional to our respective incomes.

May 19 09 - 2:12pm
Kim

Don't forget - if he is paying - he is buying !

May 19 09 - 4:08pm
WBS

Sounds more like how one conducts business then how one dates.

May 19 09 - 8:05pm
Nick

Most guys think it’s appropriate to go Dutch, but [girls disagree]. This isn’t because we’re cheap. It’s because you feel special that someone took you out and thought that it was worth it to [pay]. Later on, anything goes. If I have a better job, then I’d certainly have no problem picking up the tab. Just think about how much more energy girls put into getting ready for dates than guys: the shoes, the dress, the hair, the makeup … Emma Rabinovich

Are we debating how much energy one puts into a date? If so, then lets count how long it took to make the money that made the date possible. Lets not forget how much energy guys put into getting ready every morning and going to work: the schooling, the time on job, the actual work, the stress.

I am totally for paying for the date when i ask someone out. But, please don't try to rationalize all the time you enjoy spending getting ready to look your best as a reason that we need/should pick up the tab.

May 20 09 - 10:05am
thinkywritey

Blech. I dislike this whole cottage industry. It distresses me how dating is an activity in an of itself, rather than something that people do while getting to know each other -- or, I dont know, living their lives. All these supposed rules and flow charts...

May 20 09 - 10:55am
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