Jersey Shore Cast Now Believe Themselves To Be Legitimate Celebrities

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Look, cast of MTV’s Jersey Shore, just because you were on Conan and people are making parody videos of you, doesn’t mean you’re the new Heidi and Spencer. Okay, maybe your I.Q.s very closely match theirs, but The Hills celebrities have had to work for several seasons of being the worst before anyone started paying them money to not get married, or show up to clubs, or endorse John McCain. You can’t pull that shit after four episodes of your show. Snooki, we are looking at you and your orange crotch here.

NYC’s The Blog found out that Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi is being represented by Neon Entertainment, and her fee for appearing at your club and maybe getting punched in the face? “2000 + transportation” says Neon president, who doesn’t even know how to spell his client’s name correctly, though to be fair, neither does anyone else in the house (when you have a guy named The Situation calling you “Snickers,” it’s time to change your nickname).