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Check Out These Golden Globes, People

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OH. OH NO. OH NO, NO, NO, NO. No, Christina Hendricks, this is totally unfair to do to men of the world who all believe you made a huge, gargantuan, massive, watermelon-sized mistake when you married that unfunny twerp from (500) Days of Summer. It was entirely wrong of you to wear that boob-enhancing dress last night– as if you didn’t know that your boobs were already too big for us to wrap our minds around, let alone hands.

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Then we have Christina– the other one– and… good Lord, I think Halle Berry’s breasts were supposed to vanish once she gave birth, but apparently not…

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And we finally understood why Olivia Wilde is so popular with the horndogs of the internet. Because she is prone to wearing these kinds of outfits:

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Via here and here.