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Bad News For Health Nuts: Deadly Neurotoxins Found In Veggie Burgers

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veggieburger
Bad day for vegetarians. Hexane, a neurotoxic air pollutant is apparently in all non-organic veggie burgers. But is it actually bad for you? Or is it, like, pre-packaged foods/artificial ingredients/trace-amounts-of-feces-that-won’t-actually-kill-you bad for you?

No, it’s legitimately bad for you, and it’s totally unregulated.

Luckily, it’s only in veggie burgers, not in whole tofu, or, you know, actual burgers. Basically, hexane is used as an oil substitute of sorts, so if you’re the kind of health nut that doesn’t just go for the tempeh, but the reduced-fat tempeh, that’s where you went wrong. (There are no winners in science or in trying to be healthly.)

Would you like to know which of your favorite soy retailers (you have a favorite soy retailer now) manufacture with a poison of which has never been studied on humans before? They’re listed here.

The death blow here is definitely Trader Joe’s. Boca Burger is the Everystore’s go-to veggie burger, Morningstar Farms is just as big, and I haven’t even heard of the others  (Except Amy’s Kitchen which, neurotoxins aside, is really delicious.) But Trader Joe’s? All that is right and affordable in food? Purveyor of delicious frozen dinners and such cheap wine? Disappointing.