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Sarkozy To Obama: Let Polanski Go, Please?

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Nicolas Sarkozy: Hey, Obama.

Obama: Hey, French President.

Sarkozy: So I was thinking you could let Roman Polanski go. We’re best friends together. Also, he wrote you this letter. It explains everything? I hope it’s cool!

Obama: We’re supposed to be talking about bombs.

This is, in the minds of thousands, how last week’s nuclear summit went down. At the 2010 Nuclear Summit in Washington, where representatives from around the world met up to discuss peace and how to not attack each other with WMDs, Nicholas Sarkozy handed Obama a missive from Roman Polanski asking that the child-touching director be freed from Swiss jail (his opulent cheese chalet).

That last line of razor-sharp dialogue between Obama and Sarkozy never happened, though. Obama’s people claim he never received this letter and are refusing to touch the matter altogether. But that’s what I imagine he would have said.

The whole story broke in kind of a weird way; the only place that reported the handoff was the tiny French paper, L’Express. Most of the European press didn’t want to call him out on it since Sarkozy, apparently, is like the French Rupert Murdoch. Luckily, the American press is probably going to make a big stink about it, and good! What are you doing, president of a country? Weren’t there more important things on the agenda than trying to get your buddy, who deserves it, out of the best jail ever?