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Brazilians Need to Dance More, Have More Sex

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The Brazilian Health Minister, in an effort to help Brazilians lower their blood pressure has suggested an official health plan that cites the cardiovascular benefits of more sex and more dancing. Or probably, first more dancing, then more sex.

This just proof that the nation-state of Brazil is like a big fun party that you weren’t invited to. Everyone already knows that they have the most beautiful women in the world (her, for example), and that they’re great dancers. They’ve got a big beautiful country with lots of sunny beaches. They’ve got a national party that’s crazier than Mardi Gras and a waterfall that’s so fucking big, when Jackie O. saw it she said "Poor Niagra."

And now, they’re on a national sex and dancing regimen. Great. All we’ve got is the KFC Double-Down and a rumored remake of Footloose.