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VA Attorney General Wants Exposed Breasts Off His State Seal

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Attorney General Ken Cuccinelli does not want any cartoon eroticism to distract him from his important political business, and so when he distributed lapel pins to his staff recently he made sure that the crudely drawn boob which you would never be able to see anyway was covered up. He claims he was simply using an older version of the seal, which I think shows a impressive dedication to his state’s history.

Not surprisingly, he’s getting some flak over this, and it’s clear the only option is make the lapel even more Virginia-centric. For instance, he could put the state bird, the cardinal, over the woman’s chest:

Or he could pay tribute to Virginia’s original cash crop, tobacco:

Of course, that might piss off anti-smoking activists. So I think it’s clear that the obvious solution is to hide that breast with the disembodied head of Virginia Woolf, one of the top Google search suggestions when you type in "Virginia"!

Now that is just lovely.