While You Were Sleeping: Ass Bombing

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eHarmony is pissed off about an E! star’s affinity for bong hits, and they’re punishing the network by restricting their advertising. Let’s punish them by using Nerve Personals!

We should open all of these historic time capsules, if only to sell all their contents on eBay.

"Mike Tyson was best man at his 2008 wedding, ex-Hollywood madam Heidi Fleiss lived in his guest house after prison, and he made many of his millions betting on the housing collapse that killed Florida’s economy — normally would make a candidate like [billionaire Jeff] Greene a long shot."

"Connie was Italian, heavily tanned and probably in her fifties. She wore white clothes which all seemed to say ‘disco’ on them. We wondered what she’d been doing in Santiago de Cuba for months—til we saw her boyfriend." Connie, you’ll be shocked to find out, is a sex tourist — a female sex tourist

Apparently, "doing cannonballs" in a pool in Germany is referred to as "assbombing," and old men can be fined thousands of Euros for doing it.

Eight students having an orgy sounds like a fun Saturday night to you, but to one Florida University, it’s a source of great shame.

And Errol Morris thinks this is the best TV ad of all time. What do you say?