Nuns Get Bored With The Nunnery, Open A Massage Parlor

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Nun trading cardWe’re pretty sure Austria is the randiest place on earth. There’s always a good story in their local papers about a local orgy meetup or boarding school striptease talent show or something. We came across a bizarre one this morning, and while we may be reading too much into it, we’re still amused by the facts.

The Sisters of the Cistercian Order at Marienkron Abbey in Monchhof are using their healing hands to soothe the aches and pains of their customers with special nun massages and therapies, the Romanian Times reports.

 The five-star spa offers fitness classes with an expert in chi kung Chinese breathing exercises, and guests are pummeled with high pressure hoses of chilled mineral water to stimulate the skin. Treatments are good for the body and soul, according to the sisters who charge around $144 a night for services at the spa.

I’m going to resist speculating on why it’s $144 "a night" instead of, say, per hour, since that seems to imply a sleepover…  which, of course, we shall not fantasize about.